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Showing posts from March, 2012

The Muppets

2/4 Starring: Jason Segel, Amy Adams, Chris Cooper, Rashida Jones, and the voices of Peter Linz, Steve Whitmire, Eric Jacobson, David Goelz Rated PG for Some Mild Rude Humor "Seasame Street." "Barney and Friends." "The Muppets." These are the three most beloved shows in children's entertainment.  Although not the longest lasting (that distinction goes to "Sesame Street"), the Muppets have the most crossover appeal with older viewers and it has a number of theatrically released movies.  But for the first time in 12 years, the Muppets are back on the big screen (well, small screen in my case). Walter (Linz) is the world's biggest Muppet fan (although he is a Muppet himself, he's not a "real" Muppet).  They brought him comfort on bad days and when his older brother Gary (Segel) is going to Los Angeles with his girlfriend Mary (Adams), he is invited to come along to see the Muppet Studio.  Unfortunately, it's complet

Terminator 2: Judgement Day

3.5/4 Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton, Edward Furlong, Robert Patrick, Earl Boen, Joe Morton Rated R for Strong Sci-Fi Action and Violence, and for Language I have a confession to make.  I have not seen the original "Terminator."  Well, that's not strictly true.  My family and I started watching it a gabajillion years ago, but we turned it off because it was so boring (my brother and I were in grade school...how do you like that, MPAA?).  Actually, it doesn't really matter.  The first few minutes adequately bring the audience up to speed.  This may be a sequel, but it's a stand-alone sequel. In six years, a new program called Skynet is going to become self-aware and commit genocide on the human race.  The first attack will kill half the world's population, and force the humans into declaring an all-out war against the machines.  The leader of the humans is John Connor (Michael Edwards), and in an attempt to destroy him, Skynet sent a ma

They Live

1/4 Starring: Roddy Piper, Keith David, Meg Foster, George 'Buck' Flower, Peter Jason Rated R for Some Sci-Fi Violence and Terror Horror movies are supposed to frighten you.  A good horror movie will get under your skin and crawl its way down your spine.  "Paranormal Activity" is a good example.  By having a strong sense of atmosphere and character identification, it was able to scare me so deeply that I was afraid to move.  The reverse is also true.  Bad horror movies, like "They Live," can be tedious, stupid and irritating.  John Carpenter's dud is all three. A nameless drifter (Piper) has arrived in a nameless city looking for work.  He gets a job at a construction site but is living in a slum until he gets on his feet.  While there, he spies something odd happening in a church.  He goes to investigate and finds boxes of sunglasses that when worn show subliminal messages and people who are actually aliens bent on world domination. The set up

Carriers

4/4 Starring: Lou Taylor Pucci, Chris Pine, Piper Perabo, Emily Van Camp Rated PG-13 for Violence, Disturbing Content and Language The rules are simple.  At least that's how my brother sees it.  One, avoid the infected at all costs.  Their breath is highly contagious.  Two, disinfect anything they've touched in the past twenty four hours.  Three, the sick are already dead, they cannot be saved.  You break the rules, you die.  You follow them, you survive.  Maybe. -Danny Green The thing that always fascinates me about zombie movies is the question of what a person would do if they were the only ones left alive.  How would you survive?  What would it feel like?  How would your mind cope? Of course, in most zombie movies, this stuff is glossed over to make way for the scary violence and gore.  That's not the case with "Carriers," a perceptive and intriguing little film. "Carriers" was marketed as being a horror film a la "28 Days Later"

My Best Friend's Wedding

4/4 Starring: Julia Roberts, Dermot Mulroney, Cameron Diaz, Rupert Everett, Philip Bosco Rated PG-13 for One Use of Strong Language and Brief Sex-Related Humor On the surface, "My Best Friend's Wedding" appears to be a standard order romantic comedy.  Some people who have seen it may think it actually is.  But there is more going on here than initially meets the eye.  It feels like it a traditional romantic comedy (a very good one, but a traditional one nonetheless), but there are some substantial differences.  Most obvious is the unpredictability of the ending.  In any kind of romance, the goal of the film is to bring two people together and allow them to fall in love.  Because this requires a match of character, plot can be a detriment.  We know they're going to meet, fall in love, break up, and get back together and live happily ever after.  That's why we go to these movies.  In "My Best Friend's Wedding," that may not be the case.  This add

A Thousand Words

3/4 Starring: Eddie Murphy, Clark Duke, Cliff Curtis, Kerry Washington, Allison Janney Rated PG-13 for Sexual Situations including Dialogue, Language and Some Drug-Related Humor Eddie Murphy's new movie has gotten trashy ratings from critics, and to be honest, I don't really understand why.  Sure, the plot is eerily similar to "Liar Liar," and sometimes it cuts away from the funny scenes too early, but you know what?  It made me laugh and feel good.  What's not to like about that? Jack McCall (Murphy) is a motormouthed agent who can sign any potential client.  His latest goal is to get publishing rights to the book of a world famous guru named Dr. Sinja (Curtis).  Shortly after he sleazes his way into getting Sinja to sign with him, a tree pops up in his backyard.  Whenever he talks, a leaf falls off.  According to Dr. Sinja, this has happened before, and when the last leaf falls (after 1000 words), McCall will end up six feet under.  Now McCall will have

21 Jump Street

3.5/4 Starring: Jonah Hill, Channing Tatum, Brie Larson, Dave Franco, Ice Cube, Rob Riggle Rated R for Crude and Sexual Content, Pervasive Language, Drug Material, Teen Drinking and Some Violence The trailers for "21 Jump Street," a movie version of the cult TV show starring Johnny Depp, make the film look like a fairly generic R-rated raunchfest.  They don't do the film justice.  At all.  This is a hilarious movie that occasionally had me holding my sides to contain the pain from laughing so hard.  The story is well-thought out and not as thin as is usual for a comedy, and directors Phil Lord and Chris Miller cleverly send up the "cop movie" and "buddy comedy" in unusual ways. Geeky Schmidt (Hill) used to be tormented by Jenko (Tatum) the big dumb jock in high school.  When they both end up in the Police Academy, Jenko is forced to rely on his new friend to help him pass the exams while he helps Schmidt with the physical training.  Of course,

Match Point

4/4 Starring: Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, Scarlett Johansson, Emily Mortimer, Matthew Goode, Brian Cox, Penelope Wilton Rated R for Some Sexuality "The man who said I'd rather be lucky than good saw deeply into life." So are the opening words, spoken by the lead character, Chris Wilton, in Woody Allen's masterful thriller.  On the surface, the film seems to be about marital infidelity (bringing to mind the likes of "Fatal Attraction," a film that has absolutely no relation to "Match Point"), but it's really about luck.  There are a lot of coincidences in this movie, and that's the point.  Life is full of little coinkeydinks. Chris Wilton (Rhys-Meyers) is an ex-tennis pro who has settled in London as a tennis coach for the rich.  There, he meets a man named Tom Hewitt (Goode), whom after a round of tennis, is invited to the opera with his family.  Soon after, he's touring London with Tom's sister, the energetic Chloe (Mortimer),

Mike's Musings: Hating on the Critics

There are a lot of people who hate film critics.  They seem to hate every "good" movie and adore every pretentious, artsy-fartsy movie.  I don't blame them; for a while, I was in the same boat.  There is a film critic at our local newspaper that I absolutely loathed .  He gave mediocre to poor reviews for every movie I loved and only seemed to give good reviews to movies that showed at our local arthouse movie theater. There is a huge disconnect between film critics and audiences about the quality of movies.  It's only natural, everyone is different so in turn everyone has a different opinion of a movie.  But there's more to that, I think. The difference is volume.  Film critics see countless movies; more than any normal person.  Therefore, they may find a movie formulaic and derivative even though the average moviegoer may not.  Additionally, critics analyze movies while average moviegoers simply watch them and decide if they do or do not like them.  A critic

Underworld: Evolution

3/4 Starring: Kate Beckinsale, Scott Speedman, Tony Curran, Derek Jacobi, Steven Mackintosh Rated R for Pervasive Strong Violence and Gore, Some Sexuality/Nudity and Language I thought that the first " Underworld " was an interesting misfire.  It had a promising story and great action sequences, but Len Wiseman was more concerned about making the film look good than actually telling the story.  Here, Wiseman has either calmed down or matured as a filmmaker, because the sequel rectifies much of the first film's flaws. The sequel (which has almost nothing to do with the first film despite the return of a few characters) details the exploits of vampire Selene (Beckinsale) and her half vampire/half werewolf squeeze, Michael (Speedman).  In order to get back on the good side, they must seek the help of the first and most powerful vampire, Marcus (Curran).  Unfortunately, he has his own agenda: freeing his brother, the first werewolf William (Brian Steele), who has been

Hoodlum

3/4 Starring: Laurence Fishburne, Tim Roth, Chi McBride, Vanessa Williams, Cicely Tyson, Andy Garcia Rated R for Graphic Gangster Violence, Strong Language, A Scene of Sexuality and Some Nudity Typically in gangster movies, the guys with the tommy guns are Italian.  From "The Godfather" to "Goodfellas," the two are synonymous (although lately, Russians have taken over the job with the likes of "The Boondock Saints" and "Running Scared").  So here is "Hoodlum," a gangster movie where the central focus is on African American gangsters. Interestingly enough, there's really not much difference in how Bumpy Johnson (Fisburne) and his crew operate, as opposed to say, the Corleones.  There is a godfather (well, in this case, a Queen), generals, foot soldiers, etc.  Director Bill Duke, who is black, deliberately does not make an issue of race, and that's a wise decision.  Black, Russian, Italian...they're all human beings, a

Silent House

2.5/4 Starring: Elizabeth Olsen, Eric Sheffer Stevens, Adam Trese Rated R for Disturbing Violent Content and Terror Although "Silent House" contains a number of truly spooky sequences, the film as a whole doesn't work, due in part to a horrible performance by Elizabeth Olsen and a catastrophically bad final act. Sarah (Olsen) is spending the next few days with her father, John (Trese), and uncle, Peter (Stevens), renovating her family's summer home.  But there are a few creepy goings on upstairs, and before she knows it, she's trapped in the house with a few nasty intruders. The film's style is meant to mimic a single take (it is actually cut up into ten minute segments that are seamlessly edited together).  It's a creative choice that has a lot of potential for a movie like this.  Unfortunately, as directed by Chris Kentis and Laura Lau, it's mostly unrealized.  The technique feels contrived and constantly calls attention to itself. Also o

Unthinkable (Extended Edition)

2/4 Starring: Carrie-Anne Moss, Samuel L. Jackson, Michael Sheen, Stephen Root, Holmes Osbourne, Martin Donovan Rated R for Strong Bloody Violence, Torture, and Language What would you do if you had a man in custody who claims to have three nuclear bombs in three American cities set to go off in three days?  The U.S. Constitution doesn't allow a person to be tortured, but in this case, does the end justify the means? It's the ethical question of our time (the Bush administration perpetuated the belief that this kind of situation happens every day).  Director Gregor Jordan realized that this question could make a powderkeg of a movie, but unfortunately, his film doesn't exploit the situation effectively. FBI agent Helen Brody (Moss) watches on the news that a man named Steven Arthur Younger (Sheen) is wanted for shooting a police officer and kidnapping two kids.  But as she's wondering how she didn't get this information before the news did, she and her tea

John Carter

1/4 Starring: Taylor Kitsch, Lynne Collins, Samantha Morton, Mark Strong, Ciaran Hinds, Dominic West, James Purefoy, Willem Dafoe Rated PG-13 for Intense Sequences of Violence and Action When it comes to big budget movies, Hollywood wants to make sure that they're getting it right.  With all that money at stake, it can't be just a shameless money grab.  They have to make sure that people will actually like the movie.  Despite there being exceptions to this (like the "Transformers" franchise), big budgets mean, at worst, a decent time at the movies.  Unfortunately for Disney, "John Carter" is one of those exceptions. There's far too much plot for this movie's good.  There's enough story and subplots running around for a four hour miniseries.  That, by the way, is not the film's only problem, but it is there.  What I could figure out a Civil War soldier named John Carter (Kitsch) is looking for a cave made out of gold, and he ends up fi

Death in Love

1/4 Starring: Josh Lucas, Jacqueline Bisset, Lukas Haas, Adam Brody Rated R for Disturbing Violent and Graphic Sexual Content, Nudity and Language "Death in Love" is twisted.  That is not a compliment.  It's a creepy, pretentious and disgusting little film.  It's also entirely pointless; all of this depravity is, for a lack of a better term, "all fury and signifying nothing." The film details the exploits of a family who takes the term "dysfunctional" to a new level.  The mother (Bisset) is a Holocaust survivor who fell in love with a vicious Nazi doctor.  Her youngest son (Haas) is in his late thirties and is co-dependent on his parents and may have autistic tendencies.  The older son (Lucas) is a lothario working at a shady modeling agency who hates himself to no end. The best thing, in fact the only good thing, that I can say about this movie is that the acting is strong.  Josh Lucas, an underrated character actor, is very good as a se

Mike's Musings: Unfilmable?

I recently rewatched " Hollow Man " a week or so ago, and it got me thinking...is there anything that, under no circumstances, should be included in a movie? I've seen a lot of movies that have disturbing material in them.  Rape ("Boys Don't Cry"), domestic violence (" Once Were Warriors "), torture ("The Passion of the Christ"), explicit sex ("Lust, Caution).  You name it, I've probably seen it.  The stuff I've listed is disturbing, and often times that's the goal.  You don't watch a movie like "Once Were Warriors" when you're in the mood for light entertainment, and woe betide anyone who thinks that the movie is a lighthearted action/adventure movie (I did for a time, but that was only because Lee Tamahori's career turned to action movies later in his career). And yet, when I watched "Hollow Man," I felt unclean.  The two scenes that made me feel this way were a rape scene and particu

Act of Valor

2.5/4 Cast: Anonymous, Roselyn Sanchez, Jason Cottle, Ailsa Marshall, Alex Veadov Rated R for Strong Violence including Some Torture, and for Language "Act of Valor" is frustrating.  Character development is minimal, the story (thin as it is) doesn't make a lot of sense, and the film has a tendency to get ponderous and preachy.  But the action scenes are intense and exciting.  Can a series of well-executed action scenes make up for the deficiencies in the script?  Almost, but not quite. The film is being advertised as starring actual Navy SEALs, which it does (none of them are credited for obvious reasons).  Apparently, the SEALs were irritated during production because they were not being portrayed accurately, so they were given the roles.  It shows.  None of the action scenes seem to be rehearsed; the amount of verisimilitude is extraordinary. If only that descriptor carried over to the other aspects of the film.  The story is pretty thin, and it's little

The Lorax

2/4 Starring (voices): Danny DeVito, Zac Efron, Ed Helms, Rob Riggle, Taylor Swift, Betty White Rated PG for Brief Mild Language Short stories do not necessarily make bad movies, even ones as short as those written by Dr. Seuss (I liked "How the Grinch Stole Christmas").  Their brevity demands that the stories become plot outlines, so the difference between a good movie and a bad movie lies in the material that fills in the substantial breaks.  Ron Howard buffed up the Grinch with heart and comedy.  The team behind "The Lorax" attempts to do the same thing, only with much less satisfactory results. Ted (Efron) is a young boy with a crush on his neighbor, Audrey (Swift).  What she wants more than anything is to see a real living tree; quite a dream for someone in Theedville, where absolutely everything is manufactured in plastic, and bottled air is even sold.  But like every adolescent boy lusting after a beautiful girl, he tries to make her dream a reality.