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Showing posts from October, 2012

Mirrors

2/4 Starring: Kiefer Sutherland, Paula Patton, Amy Smart, John Shrapnel The version being reviewed is the unrated one.  For the record, the theatrical cut is rated R for Strong Violence, Disturbing Images, Language and Brief Nudity "Mirrors," a loose remake of the Korean horror film "Into the Mirror," is one of the movies that can be defined in this simple sentence: good premise, bad execution.  The idea that evil mirrors can force you to do horrible things or influence behavior towards violence or other such scary actions is intriguing and has a lot of potential.  Unfortunately, director Alexandre Aja has co-written a script that could charitably be called anemic and uses poor shot selection to tell his story. Ben Carson (Sutherland) is a cop who is wrestling with some serious demons.  While on the job, he accidentally shot an undercover officer.  Now on leave, he has stopped drinking and is taking a job as a security guard for the Mayflower shopping mall..

Into the Blue

3.5/4 Starring: Paul Walker, Jessica Alba, Scott Caan, Ashley Scott, Josh Brolin, James Frain Rated PG-13 for Intense Sequences of Action Violence, Drug Material, Some Sexual Content and Language If you had the chance to make more than a billion dollars in one day, what would you do?  Would you be willing to do some blatantly illegal activities for that shot?  What about risking your life, or those of the people you care about?  We'd like to think that we'd stay on the safe side and turn down everything to stick to the higher ground, but the truth is that most of us would take that chance.  Four people are about to find out how far they are willing to go to live on easy street. Jared (Walker) is a dive guide living in the Bahamas.  He's a treasure hunter in his free time, although he hasn't found much (due in part to the fact that his boat is rotting).  Jared lives in a trailer with his gorgeous girlfriend, Sam (Alba).  When his best friend Bryce (Caan) comes to

Kaena: The Prophecy

2.5/4 Starring (voices): Kirsten Dunst, Richard Harris, Greg Proops, Tom Kenny, Keith David, Anjelica Huston Rated PG-13 for Sensuality and Some Frightening Images I'm not going to criticize "Kaena: The Prophecy" for its low-quality animation.  It was France's first CGI film, so a little leeway must be given.  I will, however, criticize it for its complete lack of color differentiation (which often makes it impossible to distinguish a character from the background) and occasionally incompetent editing. Kaena (Dunst) is a young human girl living on Axis, a free-floating tree root.  Unlike the others in her town, she gives little weight to appeasing the gods, who require a lot of tree sap.  Kaena is an adventurer and a dreamer; the latter encouraging her to explore Axis.  Her exploration leads her to Opaz (Harris), an alien who knows the true story behind the creation of her homeworld.  This puts her and her people in dangerous conflict with their "gods:&qu

Silent Hill Revelation

2/4 Starring: Adelaide Clemens, Kit Harrington, Sean Bean, Carrie-Anne Moss, Malcolm McDowell, Martin Donovan, Deborah Kara Unger Rated R for Violence and Disturbing Images, Some Language and Brief Nudity "Silent Hill: Revelation" looks great.  Although not as eye-popping and eerily beautiful as the first film (writer/director Michael J. Bassett lacks Christoph Gans eye for detail and atmosphere), there are still plenty of cool, if grotesque, images to be found in this film.  As for the story... This sequel takes place a number of years after the original.  Christopher da Silva (Bean) has been constantly on the move with his daughter Sharon (Clemens).  They're just starting a new life in a run down city with their new identities (he calls himself Harry and she Heather).  But Sharon/Heather is still having terrifying nightmares about Silent Hill and she doesn't know why (her father never told her about her past).  When her father is kidnapped, she and the other

Sinister

4/4 Starring: Ethan Hawke, Juliet Rylance, James Ransone, Fred Dalton Thompson, Michael Hall D'Addario, Clare Foley Rated R for Disturbing Violent Images and Some Terror When I settled into my seat to watch "Sinister," I was hoping for a few spooky thrills and a cool ghost story. What I got was the most frightening ghost story I have ever seen, and one of the scariest movies I have ever watched. Ellison Oswalt (Hawke) has just moved his family into a new house to work on a new crime story.  His books are literary adaptations of unsolved crime cases, and his new book is about the murder of a family who were hung from a tree, and one of the children was never found.  Shortly after the move, Ellison finds a series of Super 8 films that turn out to be videos of similar crimes.  That's when strange things start happening at night. Ever seen a picture where the subject seems to be looking directly into you?  I remember seeing the box of the board game "The Ga

An American Werewolf in London

3/4 Starring: David Naughton, Griffin Dunne, Jenny Agutter, John Woodvine Rated R for Werewolf Violence/Gore and Some Sexuality/Nudity "An American Werewolf in London" is a horror/comedy; it contains scares and laughs in equal measure.  The humor isn't self-referential, but instead it germinates from the plot and its characters.  It's difficult enough to scare your audience while keeping them laughing when you're merely poking fun at the obvious ridiculousness of the plot.  But director John Landis fully meshes the opposing genres in a film that isn't perfect, but is, well, kind of groovy. Two Americans, David Kessler (Naughton) and Jack Goodman (Dunne), are backpacking through Europe (probably on the ultra-cheap since the first time we meet them they're getting let out of a farmer's truck where they've been riding with a bunch of sheep).  They stop in a bar called "The Slaughtered Lamb," where their reception by the locals is chi

Jeepers Creepers

3/4 Starring: Justin Long, Gina Philips, Jonathan Breck, Patricia Belcher, Eileen Brennan Rated R for Terror Violence/Gore, Language and Brief Nudity "Jeepers Creepers" is a low-budget monster movie that, while no classic, works.  It's creepy, has a sufficient amount of gore, and sustains its tension throughout the film.  This is one movie where you're smiling at the genre conventions while still getting creeped out. Siblings Darry (Long) and Trish (Philips) are taking the long way home in Trish's nearly-dead beater.  They trade quips, play stupid games involving license plates, and other stuff to pass the time.  Then they're nearly run off the road by a rusty truck.  Things get even weirder when they see the driver of the truck drop large white objects down a large pipe.  Since they're about five to six feet long and are probably 150 to 200 pounds, so it's not hard to guess what they are.  Darry can't resist a peek down to see if their susp

Dominion: Prequel to The Exorcist

3/4 Starring: Stellan Skarsgard, Gabriel Mann, Clara Bellar, Billy Crawford, Ralph Brown, Julian Wadham Rated R for Strong Violence and Disturbing Images Morgan Creek Productions presented us with an extraordinary opportunity; the opportunity to see the same story presented in two almost completely different ways.  Of course, this isn't what the company had in mind when they greenlighted Paul Schrader's version, but that's how things turned out.  True, remakes have presented different versions of the same story (or in some cases, a carbon copy), but this is a different case altogether, I think.  " Exorcist: The Beginning " is so radically different than "Dominion: Prequel to the Exorcist" that they're more cinematic cousins rather than Renny Harlin's film being a remake of the other. Schraeder made a point that he was making a psychological drama rather than a gory horror film.  So he has.  Although there are moments when this film is vio

Poltergeist

3/4 Starring: JoBeth Williams, Craig T. Nelson, Heather O'Rourke, Beatrice Straight, Zelda Rubenstein Rated PG for Scary Action, Some Gore, Language and Brief Drug Use (I guess) "Poltergeist" is one of the most famous horror movies.  It's also very overrated.  Yes, it's a good movie, but it's got some significant problems, like the story (which is pretty thin) and the pacing. The Freelings are living in a new development in suburbia.  Steve (Nelson) is a real estate agent who is helping the developer, Mr. Teague (character actor James Karen), sell the houses he built.  His wife Diane (Williams) is a stay-at-home mom to her three children: teenager Dana (Dominique Dunne), young son Robbie (Oliver Robins) and younger daughter Carol Anne (O'Rourke).  But strange things are happening to the Freelings.   Carol Anne is sleepwalking and talking to the TV set (set on static), a spot on the kitchen floor acts like a running walkway, and the kitchen table an

Seven Psychopaths

1.5/4 Starring: Colin Farrell, Sam Rockwell, Christopher Walken, Woody Harrelson Rated R for Strong Violence, Bloody Images, Pervasive Language, Sexuality/Nudity, and Some Drug Use How does one begin to describe "Seven Psychopaths?"  One doesn't defend it, that's for sure.  It's not at all interesting, nonsensical and criminally unfunny.  But it's such a mess and so hypnotically boring that it's impossible to even comprehend much of a plot. As far as I could tell, the plot goes like this: Marty (Farrell, in his second film for Martin McDonagh) is an alcoholic screenwriter trying to write a script titled "Seven Psychopaths" (ho ho ho).  He's got the first character, but that's it.  The ideas that he comes up with mirror events in his real life (to an extent).  His best friend, Billy (Rockwell), is a loose cannon who runs a dognapping scheme with Hans (Walken).  Billy and Hans run into a bit of trouble when they kidnap the dog belon

War Horse

2.5/4 Starring: Jeremy Irvine, Niels Arstrup, Emily Watson, Peter Mullan, Toby Kebbell Rated PG-13 for Intense Sequences of War Violence Without a doubt, Steven Spielberg is the most famous figure in film history.  About half of his films are masterpieces, including two (" Schindler's List " and "Saving Private Ryan") that are among the best films ever made.  But he is not without his misfires.  "War of the Worlds" was notable only for its scary action sequences.  "Munich" was good, but really only worked as a metaphor rather than a narrative piece.  And "The Adventures of Tintin: The Secret of the Unicorn" (which, like "War Horse," was released last year), lacked any of his usual touches, and as a result, was pretty generic.  "War Horse" is the only misfire on the brilliant filmmaker's resume. Ted Narracott (Mullan), a war hero turned alcoholic farmer, is bidding on a horse to help him plow the field

The Crucible

3/4 Starring: Daniel Day-Lewis, Winona Ryder, Joan Allen, Paul Scofeld, Rob Campbell Rated PG-13 for Intense Depiction of the Salem Witch Trials The Salem Witch Trials were one of the most unspeakable miscarriages of justice in US history.  Fueled by religious fanaticism and paranoia, these trials (and there were a few of them in many towns at the time) cost many people their lives.  Of course, when Arthur Miller wrote "The Crucible," he wasn't writing a historical play.  He was writing a vicious dramatic satire that pointed an angry finger at Senator Joseph McCarthy and his dramatic attempts to root out communism in the United States. The film takes place in Salem, Massachusetts (duh).  Abigail Williams (Ryder) is going with some of her friends to a little ceremony deep in the woods with the local slave, Tituba (Charlayne Woodard).  There, they do a ceremony to get the boys interested in them.  In today's world, it would be a harmless bit of fun.  But in a Pu

My Week with Marilyn

2.5/4 Starring: Michelle Williams, Eddie Redmayne, Kenneth Branagh, Zoe Wanamaker, Dominic Cooper, Emma Watson, Judi Dench Rated R for Some Language Marilyn Monroe was a star.  No, she was more than that.  She was an icon.  A symbol.  Whatever you want to call it.  Forget Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt or Robert Pattinson.  Compared to her, they're nobodies.  Marilyn Monroe was so popular that she ceased to become a human being.  "My Week with Marilyn," which is based on a true story, seeks (with limited success) to explore who Marilyn Monroe really was. Sir Laurence Olivier (Branagh) is directing his new film in England, called "The Prince and the Showgirl."  His star is none other than the world famous Marilyn Monroe.  Olivier is soon going to regret his decision as his star is unreliable, emotional and a method actor (something that he does not understand very well).  He enlists his third assistant director, Colin Clark (Redmayne) to keep an eye on her.  It is

Ghostbusters

4/4 Starring: Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Sigourney Weaver, Harold Ramis, Annie Potts, Rick Moranis Rated PG for Scary Action/Violence, Language and Some Crude Humor (I guess) The version of "Ghostbusters" that was shown to audiences starting on June 8th, 1984, was radically different from what it was originally envisioned.  The original premise had Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi as Ghost Busters, but after John Belushi died and Eddie Murphy turned it down, the whole script was rewritten (for the record, Murphy's role was Winston Zeddmore, and it would have been hugely expanded upon if he had signed on).  Then in the original rough draft, the film would have taken place in the future and there would have been teams of Ghost Busters like there are firemen and paramedics, but as written, the film would have cost $300 million in 1984 dollars.  That's nearly $640 million in today's dollars, which is more than twice to price of "Pirates of the Carri

May

1.5/4 Starring: Angela Bettis, Jeremy Sisto, Anna Faris Rated R for Strong Violence/Gore, Some Sexuality and Language "May" has become a cult horror movie over the past decade, and Lucky McKee has become fairly well known in the indie film circuit.  Judging by the utter lack of quality in his film, that should surprise me.  Then I remember that the same thing happened with Vincenzo Natali and his shitfest " Cube ."  Obviously, I don't recommend either, although I admit that "May" isn't nearly as bad. Lucky McKee's film is one that makes you want to take a shower after watching it.  It's so twisted, so bizarre, and so creepy (none of these descriptors should be construed as compliments, by the way), that had it not been for the fact that I'm writing this review, I'd have jumped into the shower and soaked all the filth away. May (Bettis) is a troubled girl.  Bullied since childhood because of her lazy eye, May is no longer a

Argo

2.5/4 Starring: Ben Affleck, Bryan Cranston, Alan Arkin, John Goodman, Victor Garber Rated R for Language and Some Violent Images One has to give Ben Affleck credit for challenging himself.  In all three movies he has directed ("Gone Baby Gone," "The Town" and "Argo"), he has chosen complex projects that demand a lot from a director.  While I applaud his bravery, I can't do the same for his inability to create truly compelling films.  Only his debut, "Gone Baby Gone," was a strong feature.  "The Town" was a fairly generic action thriller that thought it was more original than it actually was.  The fault with "Argo" is somewhat confusing narrative and acting that is way too low key. In 1979, the people of Iran overthrew the corrupt Shah.  The United States gave the Shah asylum in the US, which angered the Iranian people.  Hundreds of people working for the US Embassy in Iran were kidnapped and taken hostage.  Six of

Hair Show

0.5/4 Starring: Mo'Nique, Kellita Smith, Gina Torres, Taraji P. Henson, Keiko Agena Rated PG-13 for Sexual Content including Dialogue After laughing hysterically at nearly everything she's done (excepting the vile " Soul Plane ") and being blown away by her powerful performance in "Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire," I didn't think Mo'Nique had it in her to give a bad performance.  But here it is.  Mo'Nique is constantly irritating throughout the way-too-long 105 minute movie. Hair stylist Peaches (Mo'Nique) has been estranged from her sister Angie (Smith) ever since their grandmother left a lot of money to Angie and nothing to Peaches.  Now, five years later, Peaches is in trouble with the IRS (she owes $50,000), and she goes to Angie, who is running a successful salon in Beverly Hills, for a loan to save her neck.  To her irritation, Angie can't give her the money.  The only way they can get the money is

National Treasure

4/4 Starring: Nicolas Cage, Diane Kruger, Justin Bartha, Sean Bean, Jon Voight, Harvey Keitel, Christopher Plummer Rated PG for Action Violence and Some Scary Images I really admire Jerry Bruckheimer.  He is one of the most successful producers in Hollywood history, and there's a reason why: he knows what he's doing.  Bruckheimer knows exactly what the audience wants, and knows how to give it to them.  He's also willing to take chances.  While some of his projects of late have been franchises, he's always done something new, and hasn't had anything to do with a superhero movie so far.  "National Treasure" is an example of his softer side; early on in his career, he made ultra-violent action movies like " The Rock " and "Con Air."  Lately, however, he's been working for Disney, and has been behind the megasuccessful "Pirates of the Caribbean" franchise.  Of all the films he's done in the past decade, "Nationa

Manhunter

1/4 Starring: William Peterson, Dennis Farina, Brian Cox, Tom Noonan, Joan Allen, Kim Griest Rated R for Strong Violence, Disturbing Subject Matter and a Scene of Sexuality (I guess) Watching "Manhunter" is shocking.  Not just what's going on in the story (and as told by Michael Mann, it's trite and superficial), but what isn't there.  The main character, Hannibal Lecktor (as it was spelled in this misbegotten adaptation), is only on screen for two scenes, and is essentially ignored.  I know, I know, this was made well before " The Silence of the Lambs " (five years in fact), but Mann should have known what a unique character he had on his hands and focused more on him.  Alas, he presents this unique story as a depressingly generic serial killer movie. Will Graham (Peterson) was the FBI's best criminal profiler until a traumatic experience caused him to retire. Now a serial killer dubbed "The Tooth Fairy" (he leaves bite impressions

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

3.5/4 Starring: Logan Lerman, Emma Stone, Ezra Miller, Dylan McDermott, Kate Walsh, Melanie Lynskey, Paul Rudd, Mae Whitman, Joan Cusack Rated PG-13 for Mature Thematic Material, Drug and Alcohol Use, Sexual Content including References and a Fight--All Involving Teens Originally, I thought "The Perks of Being a Wallflower" was going to be an emo movie about teen angst (not the kind of movie that's my cup of tea, if you haven't already guessed).  That's certainly the vibe I got from hearing about it.  I suppose it is about teen angst and the characters are all off the beaten path, but it's not emo. Charlie (Lerman) is just starting his freshman year in high school.  It's not going well; he has barely walked through the door and he's already getting bullied.  He's shy and quiet.  A loner.  That is until he gets the courage to start talking to the class clown, Patrick (Miller) at a football game.  They become fast friends, and  Charlie develo

Atonement

4/4 Starring: Saoirse Roman, Keira Knightly, James McAvoy, Romola Garai, Juno Temple, Benedict Cumberbatch, Brenda Blethyn, Vanessa Redgrave Rated R for Disturbing War Images, Language and Some Sexuality "Atonement" is one of the few love stories that touches you to your very core.  It ranks among " Titanic " and " The Notebook " as one of the greatest in recent memory.  Powerful, poignant and tragic, it's absolutely unforgettable. Because it's as much a mystery as a romance, I will have to be vague when describing the plot.  Thirteen year old Briony Tallis (Roman) is living a life of luxury with her sister Cecilia (Knightly) a few years before the outbreak or World War II.  Cecilia has a complex relationship with the local gardener, Robbie Turner (McAvoy).  She no longer speaks to him, but even Briony can tell that there's something going on between them.  One day Briony sees something happen between Cecilia and Robbie, and it shocks h

Win a Date with Tad Hamilton!

1.5/4 Starring: Kate Bosworth, Topher Grace, Josh Duhamel, Ginnifer Goodwin, Nathan Lane, Sean Hayes Rated PG-13 for Sexual Content, Some Drug References and Language Romantic comedies are supposed to be light entertainment that will lift your spirits and make you want to cuddle with the one you love.  "Win a Date with Tad Hamilton!" doesn't accomplish this feat.  Not only is it a trial, none of the three central characters are especially likable. Tad Hamilton (Duhamel) is the world's biggest movie star.  He's the equivalent of Brad Pitt in his heyday.  Every woman wants him.  But he's got an image problem after the paparazzi snapped an unsavory picture of him.  So, his agent and manager (Lane and Hayes) decide to hold a contest where the winner gets a date with Tad.  The winner is his biggest fan, Rosalee (Bosworth), a small town girl from West Virginia.  He thinks Rosalee will be just another entry on his list of female conquests until she points out

The Magdalene Sisters

2.5/4 Rated R for Violence/Cruelty, Nudity, Sexual Content and Language "The Magdalene Sisters" is one of those historical dramas that might have worked better as a documentary than a fictional piece.  The subject matter is compelling and needs to be told, but it would be difficult to show the magnitude of the horrors of the Magdalene Asylums within the constraints of a narrative.  British character actor-turned filmmaker tries, with limited success, to show the brutality of what occurred in these "laundries." Three young girls: Margaret (Anne-Marie Duff), who was raped by her cousin, Bernadette (Nora-Jane Noone), an orphan who was deemed too frisky with the boys, and Rose (Dorothy Duffy), who had a baby out of wedlock, are shipped off to the Magdalene Laundries, where in the words of the sadistic Sister Bridget (Geraldine McEwan), they can work themselves to death to pay for their sins. The performances are all strong, and for the most part, compo

Anatomy

2.5/4 Starring: Franka Potente, Anna Loos, Sebastian Blomberg, Benno Furmann, Traugott Buhre, Arndt Schwerig-Sohnrey Rated R for Terror Violence/Gore, Some Sexuality and Language\ Although I call "Anatomy" a guilty pleasure, there are two reasons this gorefest won't be well appreciated by most of my readers:  it's not that good and more importantly, it's not in English.  While there are plenty of shocks and gore, and just as much sex, the film is sloppily made.  Still, there are some truly cool special effects (they were based off of BodyWorlds). Paula Henning (Potente) is a brilliant medical student who has just been accepted into an exclusive medical school program.  She's beyond excited and it rooming with Gretchen (Loos), another student in the program who, like Paula, is from Munich.  On the train, she saves the life of David (Schwerig-Sohnrey) whose heart has stopped.  But when his body ends up on her operating table a few days later, she thinks

Looper

Starring: Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Bruce Willis, Emily Blunt, Jeff Daniels, Pierce Gagnon, Qing Xu 3.5/4 Rated R for Strong Violence, Language, Some Sexuality/Nudity and Drug Content "Looper" is an astonishingly audacious and ambitious sci-fi thriller.  Director Rian Johnson's new thriller, due to clever marketing and word-of-mouth, has become one of the most talked about and mysterious films of the year.  For once, the trailers give away almost nothing about the plot.  It's too complex to be able to be fully introduced within the confines of a two minute series of clips. The film takes place in the near-future.  Time travel hasn't been invented yet, but it will be in thirty years.  It's supposed to be illegal, but the mob uses it as a way of getting rid of people who would otherwise sleep with the fishes.  Loopers, like Joe (Gordon-Levitt), are assigned to blow away the hits who get sent back in time, and shove the bodies into an incinerator. 

Pitch Perfect

3/4 Starring: Anna Kendrick, Anna Camp, Skylar Astin, Rebel Wilson, Brittany Snow, Elizabeth Banks, John Michael Higgins Rated PG-13 for Sexual Material, Language and Drug References Really, "Pitch Perfect" isn't anything special.  The plot is formulaic (and not especially well done), there are no surprises, and the ending is open-ended when it shouldn't be.  But the film nearly got a 3.5/4 for one reason alone: it's funny.   Very funny .  Occasionally sidesplittingly funny.  And it does it without an R rating to boot. The Bellas are the female a capella group at Barden University.  They're photogenic and sing the same exact, innoffensive songs every year.  They finally made it to last year's finals, only to botch it on the account that one of them suddenly vomited onstage in the middle of a number.  Now the group has only two members left: obedient Chloe (Snow) and domineering (and said vomitee) Aubrey (Camp).  Their new recruits are hardly the Ba

Gone with the Wind

3.5/4 Starring: Vivien Leigh, Clark Gable, Olivia de Havilland, Leslie Howard, Hattie McDaniel Rated G Whenever someone talks about Hollywood, "Gone With the Wind" is bound to be mentioned almost immediately.  Apart from a few exceptions, no film is more famous or beloved (adjusted for inflation, it would be the biggest grossing film of all time, garnering nearly $4 billion dollars).  At just a hair under four hours, it defines the term "epic."  Still, it's legendary status is overstated, and by quite a bit.  The film is at least 20 minutes too long and the final act becomes a daytime soap opera.  All things considered, however, it's a wonderful film. Storywise, it's really a romantic melodrama (as epics tend to be).  Scarlett O'Hara (Leigh) is a Southern Belle living on a plantation in Georgia shortly before the Civil War.  Despite being adored by every man in town, Scarlett is in love with the dashing Ashley Wilkes (Howard), one o