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Showing posts from January, 2023

Shotgun Wedding

 1/4 Starring: Josh Duhamel, Jennifer Lopez, Jennifer Coolidge, Cheech Marin, Sonia Braga, Lenny Kravitz, D'Arcy Carden Rated R for Language and Some Violence/Bloody Images Romantic comedies and action movies are relatively simple affairs.  If the former contains enough chemistry and the latter contains enough excitement, it doesn't matter how dumb and/or generic they are.  "Shotgun Wedding" tries to cross-pollinate both genres.  If it could be done well, the result could be irresistible (although despite what the publicity team has suggested, it isn't the first film to do so..." True Lies " beat it to the punch way back in 1994).  Yet it's impossible to imagine anyone finding "Shotgun Wedding" even close to acceptable.  It's about as romantic as "The Shining," about as funny as "The War Zone" and about as exciting as " August: Osage County ." Darcy (Lopez) and Tom (Duhamel) are getting married in the Phili

Shrek

 3.5/4 Starring (voices): Mike Meyers, Cameron Diaz, Eddie Murphy, John Lithgow Rated PG for Mild Language and Some Crude Humor "Shrek" is one of those rare movies that both mocks and honors its genre.  When it comes to parody of the film fantasy, few films are as sharp-edged and wicked.  And yet even amid the satire, it gives us an old-fashioned romance about a likable hero and his one true love. Shrek (Meyers) is a big surly ogre living in a swamp, where all good ogres are to be found.  That's just the way he likes it, as he takes delight in scaring away the humans who come hunting him.  His solitude is interrupted when all sorts of fairy tale creatures invade.  Everyone from Pinocchio to the Three Blind Mice is taking refuge in his swamp.  The local would-be king, Lord Farquaad (Lithgow), is obsessed with creating the "perfect" kingdom, and apparently fantasy creatures do not fit in with his vision.  Outraged, Shrek, alongside a chatterbox donkey named...Donk

Jude

 1/4 Starring: Christopher Eccleston, Kate Winslet, Liam Cunningham, Rachel Griffiths, June Whitfield Rated R for Strong Sexuality and Intense Depictions of Death and Birth "Jude" is yet another example of how a combination of big talent doesn't always lead to big success.  It certainly isn't the only one.  Does anyone remember " Allied ," the WWII dud with Brad Pitt and Marion Cotillard and directed by Robert Zemekis?  Or " Gemini Man " with Will Smith, directed by Ang Lee and produced by Jerry Bruckheimer?  "Jude" has impressive credentials.  It's based on the classic Thomas Hardy novel "Jude the Obscure."  It stars Christopher Eccleston and Kate Winslet, two of England's brightest talents.  And it's directed by Michael Winterbottom, who has made some acclaimed films (although the only one of his I like is " Goal! The Dream Begins ," and he co-directed that with Danny Cannon).  But not only doesn't th

The Pale Blue Eye

 1/4 Starring: Christian Bale, Harry Melling, Toby Jones, Simon McBurney, Timothy Spall, Lucy Boynton, Robert Duvall, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Gillian Anderson Rated R for Some Violent Content and Bloody Images And to think I was just starting to hope that 2023 would be different.  I mean, when a January PG-13 horror movie would be a contender for my Top 10 list, all bets are off.  Right?  Well, it's still January so Hollywood can turn things around, but any hopes that this year would be free from crap are now gone.  "The Pale Blue Eye" isn't just bad, it's an atrocity. West Point Military Academy, 1803.  A young cadet has just been found hanging from a tree.  What appears to be a tragic suicide turns out to be a grisly murder after the poor lad has been found with his heart cut out.  A crack gumshoe by the name of Landor (Bale) has been asked to solve the mystery.  Helping him is another cadet by the name of Edgar A. Poe (Melling).  Of course, they quickly realize t

28 Days

 3/4 Starring: Sandra Bullock, Viggo Mortenson, Dominic West, Steve Buscemi, Azura Skye, Alan Tudyk, Elizabeth Perkins Rated PG-13 for Mature Thematic Elements involving Substance Abuse, Language and Some Sensuality There's an old saying that goes, "We laugh so that we may not cry."  I think that applies here, and that recognition is what makes this film work.  "28 Days" is a comedy in the sense that it makes us smile and laugh, but what makes it more than a cheap sitcom is that it recognizes the underlying truth of the situation these people find themselves in.  Rehab isn't just about singing songs at a mountain retreat.  It's people acknowledging that their lives are a mess and they need to undergo some serious and difficult changes if they are ever going to be right again. Gwen Cummings (Bullock) is out of control, although she doesn't yet realize it.  She has a job, a boyfriend named Jasper (West) who is right there with her in the middle of the

M3GAN

 3.5/4 Starring: Allison Williams, Violet McGraw, Amie Donald, Jenna Davis, Brian Jordan Alvarez, Jen Van Epps, Ronny Chieng, Stephane Garneau-Monten, Lori Dungey Rated PG-13 for Violent Content and Terror, Some Strong Language and a Suggestive Reference You'd be forgiven for assuming that "M3GAN" is a teen-oriented ripoff of " Child's Play ."  After all, they have the same basic premise of an expensive doll that turns homicidal.  And the words "January PG-13 horror movie" are enough to send shudders down the spines of any film lover (and not for the reasons intended).  You'd be wrong, though.  The two films actually have very little in common.  Where as the Chucky movie was a black comedy/slasher hybrid, "M3GAN" is closer akin to Marry Shelly's Frankenstein. The film opens familiar enough.  Young Katie (McGraw) is in the back seat with her eyes glued to an iPad while her parents try to navigate through a blinding snowstorm and ar

The Wings of the Dove

 3.5/4 Starring: Helena Bonham Carter, Linus Roache, Alison Elliot, Elizabeth McGovern, Charlotte Rampling, Alex Jennings, Michael Gambon Rated R for Sexuality A movie doesn't need gunshots and gore to be violent.  Take for example "The Wings of the Dove," the 1997 adaptation of the Henry James novel.  There's no action or blood, and the only violence is a brief (and unsuccessful) hunting scene.  Physically, this movie contains absolutely no violence.  Emotionally?  Well, that's a different story. Kate Croy (Carter) has had her dream come true.  She grew up a poor common girl until the death of her mother.  Then her Aunt Maude (Rampling) brought her into a life of wealth and privilege.  There is a problem, however.  Kate is in love with a penniless journalist named Merton Denscher (Roache).  Maude is vehemently opposed to this, threatening to not only cast her out of society but also cut off her opium-addicted father (Gambon).  Enter Milly (Elliot), a sickly but w

Cradle 2 the Grave

 1/4 Starring: DMX, Jet Li, Gabrielle Union, Mark Dacascos, Kelly Hu, Tom Arnold, Anthony Anderson Rated R for Violence, Language and Some Sexual Content I've gone on record multiple times saying that criticizing a move for being formulaic is unfair.  If the script is good, the performances are top notch and the direction is sure, who gives a damn?  In fact, there are more than a few instances where knowing what must happen next enhances the film (" The Last Samurai " is an excellent example).  And anyway, there are plenty of "adventurous" films out there that are a load of crap.  Perhaps this is what the late Roger Ebert meant when he said "a movie is not about what it's about; it's about how it's about it." However, when the intangibles are not in place, a movie can be a real trial.  I don't have much negative to say about the performances, since the majority of them are better than the material deserves.  But the screenplay is a jok

Tootsie

 3.5/4 Starring: Dustin Hoffman, Jessica Lange, Teri Garr, Bill Murray, Sydney Pollack, Charles Durning, Dabney Coleman Rated PG (for Language) "Tootsie" is a great American comedy because it starts with the basics.  It has a terrific, smart screenplay, gifted performances from actors at the top of their game, and a director who presents the material clearly and effectively.  This is one of those movies that is so well-constructed that it looks effortless.  It isn't, but it feels like it. Michael Dorsey (Hoffman) is an out of work actor.  He's so poor that he has to share an apartment with his friend, playwright Jeff Slater (Murray).  It's not that he isn't talented, it's that his perfectionist approach has alienated him from everyone working in show business.  In the hands of anyone but Dustin Hoffman, Michael's defense of his "method" approach to his exasperated agent George Fields (Pollack) would be aggravating, but here it makes a twisted