Mike's Movie Tips

3.5/4 Starring: Gene Kelly, Donald O'Connor, Debbie Reynolds, Jean Hagen, Millard Mitchell Rated G "Singin' in the Rain" is magical, and while it's a little overlong, it's also a lot of fun.  The songs are cheery, the romance sizzles, and it's often very funny.  But because it stars Gene Kelly, the dancing is standout. Silent film stars Don Lockwood (Kelly) and Lina Lemont (Hagen) are America's sweethearts; they're the equivalent of Bennifer.  Everyone loves them and wants to believe that they're together off screen.  Of course that's not the truth.  Don feels nothing for her, but Lina thinks they're in love because that's what the tabloids say.  But with the arrival of the talkies, their stardom is threatened because Lina's voice is like fingernails on a blackboard.  Their luck changes when a girl who helped Don escape from rabid fans (before she called him on his large ego), Kathy Selden (Reynolds), has a beautiful voi...

2.5/4 Starring: Billy Crystal, Bette Midler, Marisa Tomei, Bailee Madison, Joshua Rush, Kyle Harrison Breitkopf, Tom Everett Scott Rated PG for Some Rude Humor To me, the only thing that comes close to being as irritating as the proudly nihilistic hipsters that have made Wes Anderson a demigod in independent film are the yuppie suburbanites who, due to their love of their kids, only eat organic food and spout pop psychology despite not knowing a thing about either.  They're so "trendy" they've lost sight of reality.  These people get the satirical treatment they so richly deserve, but it's neither clever or incisive enough to entertain. Alice Simmons (Tomei) is embarrassed by her parents, Artie (Crystal) and Diane (Midler) Decker.  She considers them out of touch and old fashioned.  Alice is raising three kids with her husband Phil (Scott): Harper (Madison), a stressed out violinist who is so busy practicing that she has no time to live, Turner (Rush), who...

3/4 Starring: Kurt Russell, J.T. Walsh, M.C. Gainey, Jack Noseworthy, Kathleen Quinlan Rated R for Strong Violence/Terror and Language If Hitchcock ever made an action movie (as opposed to an adventure thriller like " North by Northwest "), I imagine it would be something like this.  It starts out as a potent psychological thriller where the villains are in control, but then the tables turn when their victim refuses to play along.  Sure, it could have been a much more potent and unsettling thriller without all the crashes and action at the end, but director Jonathan Mostow is no mere hack when it comes to creating exciting action sequences (he directed " U-571 ," also starring Jack Noseworthy). Jeff Taylor (Russell) is moving to San Diego with his wife Amy (Quinlan in the first of two movies where a trip to San Diego goes to hell...the other being "The Hills Have Eyes" remake), and like everyone in this kind of movie, they decide to take the scenic...

3.5/4 Starring: Bridget Fonda, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Steven Weber, Peter Friedman, Stephen Tobolowsky Rated R for Strong Sexuality, Violence and Language We like to think of our homes as our own.  They're a place of safety where we can go to relax and recharge our batteries after dealing with the rough outside world.  But how do you survive when that sense of safety is gone? After Allison Jones (Fonda) discovers that her fiancee Sam (Weber) has cheated on her with his ex-wife,  she throws him out.  Her friend Graham (Friedman, sounding a lot like John Heard) tells her that she does not need a man in her life and is well-equipped to achieve her dreams on her own.  Still, the thought of living alone is depressing, so she puts an ad out for a roommate.  After interviewing all the freaks and losers, she chooses the last applicant, Hedra "Hedy" Carlson (Leigh).  Hedy is shy and sensitive, but handy around the house.  The two of t...

3/4 Starring: Gerard Butler, Logan Lerman, Michael C. Hall, Amber Valletta, Kyra Sedgwick, Ludacris, Alison Lohman Rated R for Frenetic Sequences of Strong Brutal Violence Throughout, Sexual Content, Nudity and Language The first time I saw "Gamer," I was thinking "What the hell did I just see?"  I liked what I saw, but there's so much going on and it is so fast and kinetic that it was difficult to piece together.  The second time around it was easier, and although it's far from flawless, it is guilty fun. In the near future, reclusive billionaire Ken Castle (Hall) has found a way to take video gaming to the next level.  Not only are controllers unnecessary, players can control live human beings.  There are two games where players can do this (both controlled by Castle): "Society," which is essentially a live version of Second Life, and Slayers, where players can can control death row inmates who are fighting their way to freedom.  If they ...

2.5/4 Starring: Jude Law, Forest Whittaker, Alice Braga, Liev Schreiber, Carice van Houten The version being reviewed is the unrated one.  For the record, the theatrical cut was rated R for Strong Bloody Violence, Grisly Images, Language and Some Sexuality/Nudity If the health care fiasco in the US wasn't so corrupt and bloodthirsty, the satirical bent of the plot would be funny.  But, since health insurance companies place their greed over human life, it's almost possible to believe that if the technology for artificial organs on demand existed, there might be a company like The Union. The Union is a company that, for a price, will give you an artificial organ.  "You owe it to yourself.  You owe it to your family," they say to nervous customers.  And they have a right to be.  The prices are obscenely high  (600K+ for a pancreas, for example), but the interest is obscene (in one case, it's 19% to start).  But since the customers don't have...

3/4 Starring: Jamie Lee Curits, Ron Silver, Clancy Brown, Elizabeth Pena, Louise Fletcher, Philip Bosco, Kevin Dunne, Richard Jenkins Rated R for Strong Graphic Violence including a Rape, Language and Some Sexuality/Nudity (I guess...) Can a movie with a script that is beyond silly be redeemed by excellent direction?  While I'm of the opinion that any script can work if handled correctly (sometimes it order to work, the script requires the film to be very  tongue-in-cheek or extremely warped), it's a rare case when this occurs.  "Blue Steel" is a case in point.  The film starts off effectively, but the longer it goes on, the sillier it becomes.  However, it is very suspenseful and action packed. Megan Turner (Curtis) is a rookie cop who is forced to gun down a shoplifter (Tom Sizemore in his first film appearance).  Because the gun is missing, she can't prove that he was even holding a gun, she can't prove that it wasn't murder.  So she's desig...

3/4 Starring: Martin Freeman, Ian McKellan, Richard Armitage, Ken Stott, Sylvester McCoy Rated PG-13 for Extended Sequences of Intense Fantasy Action Violence, and Frightening Images Without a doubt, anticipation for the first installment of "The Hobbit" franchise was very high, despite audience outrage that it was being split into two, then three movies.  Still, despite being overlong, it's worth seeing. When I watched and was absorbed by the first trilogy, I became curious about the dwarves.  Apart from Gimli, we didn't see many of them (none that had any speaking lines).  With "The Hobbit," the dwarves take center stage (apart from the hobbit Bilbo Baggins and the wizard Gandalf the Grey).  It provides the film with an interesting flavor and eliminates redundancy. The dwarves, as it happens, had a city in the Lonely Mountain.  They were forced out when the dragon Smaug barged in and nestled himself in all their treasure.  Now Thorin Oakenshield...

2/4 Starring: Lauren Holly, Ray Liotta, Hector Elizondo, Rachel Ticotin, Ben Cross, Brendan Gleeson Rated R for Terror, Strong Violence and Language "We seem to have a surplus of idiots on board."--Ryan Weaver "Turbulence" is hilarious.  I was splitting a gut the whole way through.  From its cheesy look to its absurd plot contortions to the characters who have absolutely zero brain cells, this is a must see for bad movie connoisseurs. Teri Halloran (Holly) is flight attendant whose engagement was just called off.  Naturally, she's a little depressed about this, but that's going to be the least of her problems.  She's flying from New York City to Los Angeles on Christmas Eve, and along for the ride are two captured criminals: bank robber Stubbs (Gleeson) and "suspected" serial killer Ryan Weaver (Liotta).  Trouble starts when Stubbs gets free and starts killing people, and the ever helpful Ryan tries to get everything under control.  O...

2.5/4 Starring: Orlando Bloom, Eva Green, Jeremy Irons, Liam Neeson, Marton Csokas The version being reviewed is the Unrated Director's Cut.  For the record, the theatrical cut is rated R for Strong Violence and Epic Warfare As much as I would like to say good things about Ridley Scott’s true vision of this Crusades story, I can’t.  The problem lies not with Orlando Bloom (as one might assume), but with the seriously confused script by “The Departed” scribe William Monahan and the bungled handling of some of the intrigue that goes on. Balian (Bloom) is a blacksmith (not named William Turner) whose wife has recently committed suicide.  Being of Catholic faith, this condemns her to an eternity in hell, so he reluctantly agrees to go with the father he never knew he had (Neeson) to save the soul of his wife and his own.  But when he gets to Jerusalem, he finds that the city is not so much threatened by the Saracens (Muslims), but by the rift between th...

2/4 Starring: Val Kilmer, Michael Douglas, John Kani, Tom Wilkinson Rated R for Some Violence and Gore involving Animal Attacks This could, and should, have been a good movie.  After all, what’s scarier than being hunted by a pair of maneating lions?  Unfortunately, the film (which is based on a true story) is a dud.  Some of the sequences are somewhat exciting, but everything else about this movie is a disaster. Colonel John Patterson (Kilmer) is an engineer who is sent by a viciously ambitious contractor named Beaumont (Wilkinson) to build a bridge over the Tsavo River in Africa.  He’s under a lot of pressure (if he doesn’t get it finished in five months, Beaumont will destroy him), so the tribal and cultural strife of the workers only adds to the stress.  Just when things start to go smoothly, a pair of lions starts invading the camp and snacking on the workers.  Despite his best efforts, Patterson isn’t able to deal with the problem ef...

3/4 Starring: Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Hudson, Beyonce Knowles, Danny Glover, Eddie Murphy, Annika Noni Rose Rated PG-13 for Language, Some Sexuality and Drug Content “Dreamgirls” is not a musical, at least in the way that “ TheLion King ” and “Rent” are.  Oh, there are a lot of musical numbers, and more is revealed in the songs than in the spoken dialogue.  The difference is in the context in which they are presented.  When someone sings, it’s always either in a performance or a recording session.  With one exception, no one bursts into song suddenly like they do in traditional musicals. Deena (Knowles), Effie (Hudson) and Lorrell (Rose) are three friends who have formed a singing trio called “The Dreamettes.”  While they have the talent to make it big, it takes more than that.  Help comes along when a car salesman named Curtis Taylor, Jr. (Foxx) spots them at a talent show.  Looking to get into the music business, Curtis arranges them to beco...

3/4 Starring: Brendan Fraser, Rachel Weisz, John Hannah, Arnold Vosloo, Freddy Boath, Patricia Velasquez, The Rock “The Mummy Returns” is the first sequel to the 1999 smashhit , and it’s surprisingly a lot of fun.  It’s also quite a bit different than its predecessor.  That one was a unique mix of horror, history and pulp adventure.  This follow up is almost all action; the only scenes where someone isn’t swinging a sword, shooting a gun or doing some kind of stunt are the ones that are included simply to move along the plot.  While I will make no statement saying that that the original didn’t play fast and loose with Ancient Egyptian history and mythology, “The Mummy Returns” goes even further.  Not that that’s a bad thing… Set ten years after the first adventure, Rick O’Connell (Fraser) has married Evelyn (Weisz) and they have a young son named Alex (Boath).  The two are archaeologists (but considering some of their techniques, I think som...

2.5/4 Starring: Minka Kelly, Leighton Meester, Cam Gigandet, Aly Michalka Rated PG-13 for Violence and Menace, Sexual Content, Some Language and Teen Partying I suppose part of the reason why I’m giving this movie a lukewarm review as opposed to completely eviscerating it because I love these kinds of movies, and I fully expected this movie to end up on my Bottom 10 list for the year.  After all, it stars a cast of photogenic actors who made a name for themselves where good looks matter far more than acting talent (Meester in “Gossip Girl,” Gigandet in “The OC” and “ Twilight ”).  And it’s a PG-13 movie in a genre that demands an R rating. The plot is virtually the same as “Single White Female” only transported to a college in LA (where else would a movie like this take place?).  Small town girl Sara Matthews (Kelly) has just moved into her new dorm, and has already made friends with the local party girl, Tracy (Michalka).  Her roommate only shows u...

1.5/4 Starring: Andy Garcia, Michael Keaton, Marcia Gay Harden, Joseph Cross, Brian Cox Rated R for Violence and Language You know, for the longest time, I kept getting “Extreme Measures” (the much better Hugh Grant medical thriller) and this movie confused.  Both films share half their titles, and they convey similar meanings.  But one thing that must not be confused is their level of quality.  “Extreme Measures” is a solid thriller.  “Desperate Measures” is anything but. The premise has promise.  A cop named Frank Connor (Garcia) is in an unenviable situation: his son Matt (Cross) is dying of leukemia, and the only one who can give him a bone marrow transplant that will save his life is a serial killer named Peter McCabe (Keaton).  After much pressuring and begging from Connor, McCabe agrees to undergo the procedure.  But McCabe escapes and goes on the run.  He’s racking up an impressive body count, and the police are willing t...

1/4 Starring: Ayoub Ahmadi, Rojin Younessi, Amaneh Ekhtiar-dini, Madi Ekhtiar-dini Not Rated (Probably PG for Thematic Material) It was about the time that "A Time for Drunken Horses" was released (2000) that I first started getting into movies.  I can't remember why I wanted to see it, although I distinctly remember my local paper giving it either a 3.5/4 or a 4/4 (I think it was the latter).  Still, I knew nothing about it.  It has taken until tonight for me to be able to see it.  It wasn't worth the wait. After their father died, young Ayoub (Ahmadi) must get a job and take care of his siblings, including his crippled brother Madi (Madi Edhtiar-dini), who will die if he doesn't get constant doses of medication.  But the medication is failing, and unless Madi gets an operation in Iraq he will die (and an operation will only extend his life for 7 or 8 months).  Not only is the operation expensive, but the journey is dangerous. The problem here is...

1.5/4 Starring: Seth Rogen, Barbara Streisand Rated PG-13 for Language and Some Risque Humor "The Guilt Trip" is really two movies in one: an cringe-inducing comedy and a moderately effective comedy-drama.  The last act is decent enough, but definitely not worth sitting through the first hour to get to. Andy Brewster (Rogen) is a young chemist who has a brilliant idea for a new cleaner he calls Scioclean (as in science + clean...ho ho ho).  Because his mother Joyce (Streisand) is lonely, he invites her to join him on a trip to sell his product.  It's a decision he's going to regret. The nagging, neurotic mother is a stereotype frequently associated with Jewish women, but frankly, they're found across all faiths.  Everyone's mother nags them about this, that and the other thing (mine does).  That's their job.  Handled correctly, it could be the basis of a hilarious comedy.  Unfortunately, director Anne Fletcher does nothing with it and Streisa...

3/4 Starring: Kirk Douglas, Jean Simmons, Laurence Olivier, Charles Laughton, Peter Unistov, Tony Curtis Rated PG-13 for Graphic Violence (I guess) Stanley Kubrick is widely considered one of the top directors in film history.  It's not hard to see why.  Nearly every movie of his is considered a classic, and the two that I've seen ("Eyes Wide Shut" and "The Shining") are very, very good.  "Spartacus" is good, and I do recommend it, but it is not the classic that many believe it is. The film details the life of the slave turned rebel Spartacus (Douglas).  After being sold to fight as a gladiator and being forced to fight to the death for the amusement of a nasty senator named Crassus (Olivier) and a few of his piggish friends, and has lost his love, Varinia (Simmons) to Crassus, Spartacus has had enough.  He revolts, and the rest of the slaves there escape with him.  They inspire a number of other slaves to join the rebellion, and soon their...

3/4 Starring: Guy Pearce, Robert Carlyle, Jeffrey Jones, David Arquette, Neal McDonough, Jeremy Davies, John Spencer, Stephen Spinella Rated R for Considerable Gore and Strong Violence Antonia Bird's thriller "Ravenous," opens up with an ominous quote (as some movies do).  She chose Nietzche's famous quote: "He that fights with monsters should look to himself that does not become a monster." And right under that slides in another popular quote: "Eat Me!" (credited to Anonymous, of course). Both quotes are appropriate, but more importantly, they set the tone for the movie.  Yes, this is a thriller (and one could argue that it falls into the horror category as well), but it's immediately apparent that Bird isn't afraid of twisting our expectations. Captain John Boyd (Pearce) has just been proclaimed a hero for getting behind enemy lines during a battle of the Mexican-American War.  But the truth, as his superior (Spencer in his fi...

3/4 Starring: Whoopi Goldberg, Lauryn Hill, Kathy Najimy, Wendy Makkenna, Mary Wickes, James Coburn, Maggie Smith Rated PG for Some Mild Language "Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit" is one of those rare sequels (before today's Hollywood, where franchises are planned before anything else) that is better than the original.  Barely, but still superior. After the events in the first film , Dolores Van Cartier's (Goldberg) singing career is just starting to take off.  That's when three of her old friends, energetic Sister Mary Patrick (Najimy), soft-spoken Sister Mary Robert (Makkena) and salty-tounged Sister Mary Lazarus (Wickes), come to Vegas to plea for her help.  They're teachers at a school whose pupils are, how do I put this, teenage terrors.  The sisters need Dolores to re-don the habit and become Sister Mary Clarence once again.  Reluctantly, she agrees.  They students are nightmares, but they've met their match with this nun.  Unfortunately,...

2.5/4 Starring: Agnes Bruckner, Jonathan Jackson, Laura Ramsey, Rick Cramer, D.J. Controna, Meagan Good, Bijou Phillips, Pawel Szajda, Davetta Sherwood Rated R for Strong Horror Violence/Gore, and Language "Venom" is a mix of the good and the bad.  There are some effectively tense scenes and the film always looks great.  However, it is poorly organized and the editing is at times haphazard.  I can't in good conscience give it a 3/4, but it comes pretty damn close. Eden (Bruckner) and her friends are chilling at a drive-in when they see the local redneck tow-truck driver, Ray Sawyer (Cramer).  After exchanging a few snide words behind his back, Eden gets off work and drives home.  She's stopped by her ex-boyfriend Eric (Jackson), and they argue about why they split up (it's because she decided to go to Columbia University instead of LSU without telling him, although they can't decide who dumped who).  Ray stops by to make sure that Eden is okay, but ...

2/4 Starring: Kerry Fox, Anamaria Marinca, Stephen Dillane, Rolf Lassgard, Alexander Fehling, Kresimir Mikic, Drazen Kuhn Not Rated (Probably PG-13 for Material involving War Crimes) "Storm," which was distributed by Film Movement, an organization dedicated to art films, is essentially a Hollywood courtroom drama dressed up in art and sexed up with terms like "war crimes."  And unfortunately, it's not a very good one.  Every plot development is predictable (and at times confusing), the characters are cliches, and by and large the acting is flat. Hannah Maynard (Fox) is a prosecutor in the Hague Criminal Court who has just been passed over for promotion.  Instead, the job went to her co-worker Keith Haywood (Dillane), who gives her the task of closing a relatively open and shut case.  A Serbian commander named Goran Duric (Kuhn) is on trial for war crimes.  All Hannah has to do is lead the witness through his testimony and close the case.  But the wi...

3.5/4 Starring: Ethan Hawke, Julie Delpy Rated R for Some Strong Language The key to any great romance is chemistry.  Physical appearance, skill at sex scenes, or dialogue mean little unless the two lovebirds go together.  We have to believe that the two characters could, and should, fall in love.  Richard Linklater's "Before Sunrise" works because we love Jesse and Celine, and we want them to be together.  Due to their circumstances, it's not possible, but we still wish it.  It's a pleasure to spend an hour and a half with these two. Celine (Delpy) is a young French woman on a train headed home from Budapest.  Much to her annoyance, she is sitting next to a middle aged couple who are shouting at each other.  She moves to the back of the car and sits across from Jesse (Hawke), a young American.  They chat.  It's all small talk; the kind of thing you'd say to the random person next to you when there are two assholes at each other's thr...

3/4 Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Vanessa Williams, James Caan, Robert Pastorelli, James Coburn, James Cromwell, Roma Maffia Rated R for Violent Action Throughout and Some Language "Eraser" is one of those good old fashioned action movies.  The kind that in days of endless superheroes and cheesy fantasy, we remember when most action movies were filled with bullets, brawn and stunts.  There are no witches, wizards or elves to be found here, and the lead character doesn't have a skin tight outfit (although he is like the Energizer bunny...he'll keep going til the cows come home.  That's Ah-nuld for you). Witnesses who testify in high powered criminal trials are sometimes sent into Witness Protection.  Some, like Johnny Casteleone (Pastorelli), have trouble staying in hiding.  When you're found out by the people who want you dead, they send in guys like John Kruger (Schwarzenegger), who clean up the mess ("This only happens one.  Next time, you...

2.5/4 Starring: Anthony Hopkins, Helen Mirren, Danny Huston, Scarlett Johannson, Jessica Biel, Toni Collette, Michael Stuhlbarg, Michael Wincott, Richard Portnow, Kurtwood Smith Rated PG-13 for Violent Images, Sexual Content and Thematic Material It is rather tragic that Alfred Hitchcock, the undisputed Master of Suspense and possessor of a famously morbid sense of humor, died 11 years before Anthony Hopkins played his most famous role, the wickedly evil Hannibal Lector in " The Silence of the Lambs ."  I have no doubt in my mind that Hitch would have been amused with the character, and probably would have loved to bring him to the screen had he the chance. It is therefore fitting, I think, that Hopkins portray him on film.  Alas, this is not the film that we have been looking for.  "Hitchcock" is a decent film, but suffers from shallow writing, poor focus and unorganized direction. Alfred Hitchcock (Hopkins) has just released his classic "North by No...

3/4 Starring: Kurt Russell, John Leguizamo, Halle Berry, David Suchet, Oliver Platt, Len Cariou, J.T. Walsh Rated R for Violence Between March of 1996 and July 1997, there were three big budget action movies set on airplanes: "Executive Decision," which features soldiers attempting to gain entry to a hijacked passenger jet, "Air Force One," which features a hijacked Air Force One, and "Turbulence," which features a passenger jet hijacked by a serial killer.  Of the two that I've seen (haven't seen "Turbulence" although it's reportedly awful and was a major flop for MGM), "Air Force One" is the best, but "Executive Decision" is still good fun. A terrorist (Andreas Katsoulas) has been captured, but the deadly nerve agent he had in his possession is missing.    Now, it has found its way onto Oceanic Flight 343, which is flying from Athens to Washington DC.  Now it's up to a team of soldiers led by Lt. Colo...

3/4 Starring: Neve Campbell, Skeet Ulrich, Courtney Cox, Rose McGowan, Matthew Lillard, Jamie Kennedy, Drew Barrymore, voice of Roger Jackson Rated R for Strong Graphic Horror Violence and Gore, and for Language Although history has clearly showed that "Scream" has played well to audience members who are not slasher movie aficionados, this is one of those movies where the more movies of the genre, the more references and enjoyment you'll get from the movie.  I've seen my fair share of slasher movies, although few of the "classics" (I have seen "Halloween," and own "Friday the 13th" but haven't seen it), although not many before I saw Wes Craven's film for the first time.  After watching a few of these, some good (" Wrong Turn "), some awful (" The Nun "), I realized how much more of the humor and the references I got. The film gets off to a great start.  In fact, it can be easily argued that the opening...