Double Impact
1/4
Starring: Jean-Claude Van Damme, Geoffrey Lewis, Alonna Shaw, Philip Chan, Alan Scarfe
Rated R for Strong Violence, Sensuality and Language
When "Double Impact" started, I felt a little nostalgia coming on. I looked forward to the simple, formula plot, the one-liners, and the ludicrous action scenes. Above all, I looked forward to the sense that I was seeing a story with a beginning, middle and end, where words like "franchise," "Easter eggs," "sequel/remake/reboot" and "superhero" did not apply. Such qualities would have been commonplace in 1991 when "Double Impact" was released. Today, they're positively retro.
The feeling was short-lived, however. Such descriptors, however pleasant, are only advisable when there's a solid foundation to build upon. Here, there's nothing. It's all vapidity, and occasionally, a lot of noise. The film's plot is non-existent. The dialogue is a joke. And the performances are, with one exception, universally awful.
Twenty-five years ago, Paul Wagner (Andy Armstrong) was instrumental in building a key tunnel in Hong Kong. For reasons that are never made clear, he was betrayed, and he and his wife were brutally murdered by his partners and some Chinese gangsters. Their newborn twin sons, Alex and Chad, were split up. One went with the nurse to an orphanage, the other with Paul's bodyguard Frank Avery (Lewis). Now, Frank has brought them back to get revenge and take back their legacy.
Admittedly, the premise is nothing short of complete idiocy, which would be forgivable if the film had anything else to offer. But it doesn't. It's just one long, lifeless slog through a story so inane that I had a hard time remembering what happened five minutes prior. Not that strict attention is required. Or encouraged.
Jean-Claude Van Damme, who co-wrote the screenplay, wanted to play the dual role to showcase his range. It doesn't work. He's no more convincing as the milquetoast yoga instructor Chad than the "badass" smuggler Alex. He's horrible in both roles. His female co-star Alonna Shaw was obviously cast for her looks, since even the simplest line of dialogue escapes her. Philip Chan and Alan Scarfe are non-entities as the villains. Only Geoffrey Lewis manages to escape reasonably unscathed, but he has so little to do that it was probably just an easy paycheck for him.
At least it's good for some mindless fun, right? Turn off your brain, crack open a beer and have a good time melding into the couch. Nope. "Double Impact" is bad for all the reasons I've listed, but it's fails at even being a mindless action movie. Director Sheldon Lettitch is so incompetent that none of the action scenes have any sort of energy or life. There's no spark that grabs our attention. It's just a lot of badly choreographed, mind-numbing noise.
"Double Impact" is awful. There's no other way to say it. The only reason I'm giving it a 1/4 instead of something lower that it probably deserves is the nostalgia factor and because some parts are so bad they're funny.
Trust me. Don't bother.
Starring: Jean-Claude Van Damme, Geoffrey Lewis, Alonna Shaw, Philip Chan, Alan Scarfe
Rated R for Strong Violence, Sensuality and Language
When "Double Impact" started, I felt a little nostalgia coming on. I looked forward to the simple, formula plot, the one-liners, and the ludicrous action scenes. Above all, I looked forward to the sense that I was seeing a story with a beginning, middle and end, where words like "franchise," "Easter eggs," "sequel/remake/reboot" and "superhero" did not apply. Such qualities would have been commonplace in 1991 when "Double Impact" was released. Today, they're positively retro.
The feeling was short-lived, however. Such descriptors, however pleasant, are only advisable when there's a solid foundation to build upon. Here, there's nothing. It's all vapidity, and occasionally, a lot of noise. The film's plot is non-existent. The dialogue is a joke. And the performances are, with one exception, universally awful.
Twenty-five years ago, Paul Wagner (Andy Armstrong) was instrumental in building a key tunnel in Hong Kong. For reasons that are never made clear, he was betrayed, and he and his wife were brutally murdered by his partners and some Chinese gangsters. Their newborn twin sons, Alex and Chad, were split up. One went with the nurse to an orphanage, the other with Paul's bodyguard Frank Avery (Lewis). Now, Frank has brought them back to get revenge and take back their legacy.
Admittedly, the premise is nothing short of complete idiocy, which would be forgivable if the film had anything else to offer. But it doesn't. It's just one long, lifeless slog through a story so inane that I had a hard time remembering what happened five minutes prior. Not that strict attention is required. Or encouraged.
Jean-Claude Van Damme, who co-wrote the screenplay, wanted to play the dual role to showcase his range. It doesn't work. He's no more convincing as the milquetoast yoga instructor Chad than the "badass" smuggler Alex. He's horrible in both roles. His female co-star Alonna Shaw was obviously cast for her looks, since even the simplest line of dialogue escapes her. Philip Chan and Alan Scarfe are non-entities as the villains. Only Geoffrey Lewis manages to escape reasonably unscathed, but he has so little to do that it was probably just an easy paycheck for him.
At least it's good for some mindless fun, right? Turn off your brain, crack open a beer and have a good time melding into the couch. Nope. "Double Impact" is bad for all the reasons I've listed, but it's fails at even being a mindless action movie. Director Sheldon Lettitch is so incompetent that none of the action scenes have any sort of energy or life. There's no spark that grabs our attention. It's just a lot of badly choreographed, mind-numbing noise.
"Double Impact" is awful. There's no other way to say it. The only reason I'm giving it a 1/4 instead of something lower that it probably deserves is the nostalgia factor and because some parts are so bad they're funny.
Trust me. Don't bother.
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