A Nun's Curse

 1.5/4

Starring: Erika Edwards, Kristi Ray, Damian Maffei, Gunner Willis, Felissa Rose

Not Rated (probable R for Horror Violence/Gore and Brief Language)

"A Nun's Curse" is a no-budget, grade-Z ghost story.  That doesn't make it bad.  Just that it has to be accepted on those terms.  You can't compare a movie like "Bleed" with something like "Event Horizon," for example.  Both films have different goals (and budgets) and must be judged on their own terms.  Taking that into consideration, "A Nun's Curse"would have been an at least adequate horror movie.  If it wasn't for that damn ending.  Both of them, actually.

Four young people are on their way to a weekend getaway, but they aren't exactly friends.  Bitchy queen bee Gabby (Ray) is looking forward to some alone time at her parents' cabin with Anthony (Maffei), her squeeze of the moment.  But to do that, she has to take along her sister, Ashley-Kae (Edwards) who has a strange obsession with a serial killer nun named Sister Monday (Rose).  How Michael (Willis), a boy who sits next to Ashley-Kae in psychology class, came to tag along is never made clear.  Anyway, they get stranded while Ashley-Kae is taking pictures of the burned down convent where Sister Monday used to live (of course) and take refuge in the old prison where the evil nun went after the convent was destroyed. There, spooky things happen.

This is obviously a movie made by amateurs.  The acting is stiff, the shot selection is pedestrian, there isn't a lot of atmosphere, blah blah blah.  That doesn't make it bad.  In fact, accepting this allowed me to see that the film has some strengths.  While none of the cast is going to win an Oscar anytime soon, they do their jobs.  Erika Edwards has a certain awkward charm that is kind of endearing.  Kristi Ray goes full tilt when playing the bitch, and Damian Maffei is good as a lunk with more muscles and hormones than common sense.  And while the screenplay isn't on par with a David Mamet play, it does have some funny one-liners peppered here and there.

What the film is missing is a story.  There is too much wandering around and melodrama between the characters and not enough plot.  I accepted these characters as people so the soap opera stuff had some interest, but this is a horror movie.  That demands scares, dead bodies and gore.  "A Nun's Curse" has a little of each to stave off boredom, but not enough.

At least the film is only 73 minutes long, so it doesn't overstay its welcome.  But it feels like a bait and switch.  When I want a cheeseburger, don't give me a hot dog.  If I sit down to watch a movie called "A Nun's Curse," I expect to be creeped out at the very least.  Not watch coming-of-age stuff or sisterly squabbles.

Writer/director Tommy Faircloth knows the tricks of pulling off horror tropes common in movies like this.  Things moving in the background, parallelism, and holding on shots where the characters can see something scary but the audience can't.  It's not polished, but he has promise.  That's more than can be said for many filmmakers with bigger budgets.

Alas, if it hadn't been for the final five minutes.  Not only does he close the film with one of the oldest cliches in movies like this, he does another bait-and-switch.  I'm not going to spoil it to avoid revealing how dumb it is, but you'd think he'd have enough integrity and creativity to avoid something that will inevitably make a person roll their eyes.

Had Faircloth done something different or followed through with his own storyline (which hasn't been done in so long that it would likely seem new again), I might have labeled this movie as a mild entertainment. But no, he had to cheapen it.  And now, it's place on my Bottom 10 list is all but assured.