Mike's Movie Tips

I didn't see as many movies as I did last year.  Far from it.  Which is why two movies this year have 3/4, although I bumped up "Oblivion's" to 3.5/4.  What does that say about this year's movies?  Nothing much, really.  I've missed a few of the Oscar contenders because I don't like the arthouse theaters in my area.  I reserve the right to add them if and when I see them. Note: I completely forgot about "Frozen," which is clocks in at number 8 on my list.  "Homefront" is kept as an honorable mention. Honorable Mention.   Homefront .  This is a good old fashioned action movie, only with more depth than is commonly associated with action movies.  The bad guys aren't as bad as they seem, and when things get tough, they act in ways that we don't expect them to. 10.   Oblivion .  A visually dazzling sci-fi mystery with strong performances.  Although inferior, it bears mention to last year's Top 10'er " Looper ....

While I mentioned that this year had a few huge flops, overall it was a great year for Hollywood.  Still, it's that time of year again, where I single out the biggest stinkers of the year. Dishonorable Mention : Epic.  There's no review for this movie because, due to a storm and the cancellation of the remainder of the film by the theater, I was unable to see the entirety of the film.  I meant to go back and catch the last ten minutes of the film at a later date, but I never got around to it.  And there's certainly no way I'd sit through it again.  From what I saw (and there's nothing the film could have done to make me rate it much higher), it would clock in at number 10. 10.   You're Next : While this movie was really bad, it's as much an insult to filmgoers on part of the studio to release it so close to the senseless murder of Chris Lane.  Aside from that, I still wouldn't have given it a higher rating.  The movie sucked.  Did the dir...

2.5/4 Starring: Keanu Reeves, Hiroyuki Sanada, Ko Shibasaki, Rinko Kikuchi, Tadanobu Asano, Min Tanaka, Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa Rated PG-13 for Intense Sequences of Violence and Action, Some Disturbing Images, and Thematic Elements One would assume that the story of the 47 Ronin, Japan's national legend (thousands of people visit the graves of these men each year), deserved a better treatment than this.  The themes of honor, revenge and sacrifice would be at home in an epic action movie on par with " The Last Samurai " or " Avatar ."  Instead, we have this fantasy/action picture, which, while certainly not bad (in fact, I almost gave it a 3/4), is a little underwhelming. The story of the 47 ronin (samurai without a master...a huge disgrace under the Japanese code of bushido) has been told so many times since the actual event in 1701 that it has its own genre (chushingura).  This $200 million film is just the latest version. Kai (Daniel Barber) is a "h...

3/4 Starring: Tom Hanks, Emma Thompson, Annie Rose Buckley, Colin Farrell, Paul Giamatti, Bradley Whitford, Jason Schwartzman, B.J. Novak, Ruth Wilson Rated PG-13 for Thematic Elements and Some Unsettling Images These days, it seems that almost every Oscar hopeful is a biopic of some kind.  From "Patton" to " Schindler's List " to " Rush ," biographies mean gold statues.  The reason, I think, is that the audience knows who the person is, and the characters are more realistic and intelligent than in the majority of fictional movies. "Saving Mr. Banks" is about the relationship between Walt Disney and P.E. Travers ("Mrs. Travers, please!") during the making of the classic adaptation of her beloved character, Mrs. Poppins.  It's not necessarily the most cinematic tale, but it is interesting and the acting is strong (with Tom Hanks and Emma Thompson as the leads, that shouldn't come as a surprise). Twenty years ago, Wa...

3/4 Starring: Bill Goldberg, Douglas Smith, Emilie de Ravin, Robert Culp, Dave Thomas, Saul Rubinek Rated R for Violence, Language and Some Sexuality/Nudity Read that title carefully before you let little Susie see this movie.  It's "Slay," not "Sleigh." "Santa's Slay" is a guilty pleasure.  It's unbelievably cheesy and obviously made on the cheap.  It's not particularly smart, either.  But, it is funny. Santa, as we learn, is not a very nice guy.  In fact, he's the son of Santa and someone named Erica (who, aside from Mary, is the only woman to have a virgin birth).  He's as nasty as they come, but after he lost a curling bet with an angel, he was forced to be nice to kids and spread Christmas cheer for a thousand years.  Time's up! Nicholas Yuleson (Smith) lives with his Grandpa (Culp), who is a little bit odd.  Nicholas, who isn't the brightest bulb in the bunch, doesn't believe in Santa Claus and doesn...

4/4 Narrated by Alex Gibney Rated R for Disturbing Images, and Content Involving Torture and Graphic Nudity "Taxi to the Dark Side" is a documentary, yes, but it is far more disturbing and terrifying than most horror movies.  Why?  Because it's real. Alex Gibney, who directed the documentary "Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room," has used his no-nonsense and no-frills style to examine the torture of detainees by the US government post-9/11.  Little by little, he examines every facet of what happened and why. Without a doubt, the horrors that occurred at Abu Gharib and Bagram were among the most shameful events in the history of our nation.  Gibney shows us images, and occasionally videos, of the treatment that these people endured.  Insane amounts of sleep deprivation (to the point of inducing psychosis), forced nudity, manipulating the detainee's fears, sensory deprivation (which induced psychosis), forcing them to stand for more than 24 hours. ...

3.5/4 Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Jonah Hill, Margot Robbie, Rob Reiner, Kyle Chandler, Joanna Lumley, Jean Dujardin Rated R for Sequences of Strong Sexual Content, Graphic Nudity, Drug Use and Language Throughout, and for Some Violence If you can imagine " Goodfellas " as a raunchy sex comedy, you'll have some idea of what "The Wolf of Wall Street" is like.  It follows the formula of his 1990 gangster classic to the letter, although the specifics are polar opposite.  It's just as R-rated (in fact, it's only the names of Martin Scorcese and Leonardo DiCaprio on the marquee that keep this from getting an NC-17...and what they mean by "sequences of" is beyond me, since if there was any more it could be called a porn flick). Jordan Belfort (DiCaprio) arrives in New York City seeking to make his fortune in the stock market.  He learns all he needs to know from a trader named Mark Hanna (Matthew McConaughey in what is sadly little more than...

3.5/4 Starring: Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Chloe Grace Moretz, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Morris Chestnut, Jim Carrey, John Leguizamo, Lindy Booth, Clark Duke, Donald Faison, Olga Kurkulina Rated R for Strong Violence, Pervasive Language, Crude and Sexual Content, and Brief Nudity "This isn't a comic book!  This is real life!" My main criticism with the first " Kick-Ass " was that while it while it provided a more realistic view of superheroes, they still seemed immune from the law.  That's changed here.  Not only do these costumed vigilantes (that's what they are, and they know it) face physical danger, they face personal and legal trouble for their actions. Dave Lizewski (Taylor-Johnson) has hung up the Kick-Ass costume for good.  But he's bored, so he begins training again with Mindy Macready (Grace Moretz).  When he looks online, he finds out that someone is gathering superheroes to form a league.  Dave thinks that this is the best thing eve...

3.5/4 Starring: Jennifer Love Hewitt, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Freddie Prinze Jr., Ryan Phillipe, Anne Heche, Bridgette Wilson Rated R for Strong Horror Violence and Language All throughout my life, there was no movie I was dying to see more than "I Know What You Did Last Summer."  I was constantly begging my parents to let me see it.  Ask them if you don't believe me.  Looking back, I'm glad they had the good sense to keep my fourth grade self from seeing a slasher movie, but there you have it.  It's really not that hard to see why it appealed to me.  The trailer was awesome, the poster looked seriously mysterious, and let's face it, that's a hell of a great title. It's July in a fishing village on the east coast.  Julie James (Hewitt) is celebrating her friend Helen Shivers (Gellar) as the new beauty queen.  They and their two boyfriends, rich snob Barry Cox (Phillipe) and local boy Ray Bronson (Prinze, Jr.) are going out partying on the beach....

3/4 Starring: Hilary Swank, Simon Baker, Jonathan Pryce, Adrien Brody, Brian Cox, Joely Richardson, Christopher Walken Rated R for Some Sexuality If you haven't guessed it by now, I say to you now that I'm a huge history buff (although I prefer anything pre-Christianity).  To me, history is like one big story that tells us about fascinating characters and how they lived.  I also like twisty, intriguing mysteries.  Both are in evidence in "The Affair of the Necklace." Years ago, Jeanne de Valois (Hayden Panettiere) was a happy little girl living in France.  Then her father, a critic of the monarchy, was arrested and killed for his actions.  Penniless and cast out from her home, Jeanne witnessed the death of her mother and grew up an orphan.  As an adult Jeanne vows to get her home back and her name restored.  She and a kindly gigolo named Retaux de Vilette (Baker) set in motion a plan to do so.  Her plot, which involves an embarrassed cardi...

3/4 Starring: Gerard Butler, Lena Headey, David Wenham, Dominic West, Rodrigo Santoro Rated R for Graphic Battle Sequences Throughout, and Some Sexuality and Nudity "300" is a cult classic; an adrenaline cocktail that was born to have rabid fans.  It is violent and bloody, and all the better for it.  There is nothing subtle about this blend of machismo and brutality.  It doesn't seek to be anything other than it is: a deliriously over-the-top action movie designed to get the fists pumping and the blood flowing. In Ancient Sparta, war is not just a hobby or a necessity.  It is a way of life.  From birth to death, men prepare for war and women breed soldiers.  One day, a Persian emissary (Peter Mensah) comes with one request for the Spartan King Leonidas (Butler): earth and water.  In other words, the Persian king Xerxes (Santoro) requests submission and a small tax in exchange for their city-state not to be obliterated.  Now, Spartans are a...

1.5/4 Starring: Robert DeNiro, Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Skipp Sudduth, Wanda DeJEsus, Daphne Rubin-Vega Rated R for Pervasive Language and Strong Violence not to be confused with the 2007 movie with Michael Caine and Demi Moore Who could have thought that a movie starring Robert DeNiro and Phillip Seymour Hoffman, two of the best actors now working, could have been boring?  And yet, Joel Schmaker's 1999 thriller/buddy comedy, is one long slog through cliches and boredom.  There's very little of interest here. Walter Koontz (DeNiro) is as grumpy and reactionary as they come.  A former security guard who foiled a bank robbery rears ago, Walt is living in a bad apartment building in New York City.  Making matters worse is that on the other side of the courtyard, Rusty the drag queen (Hoffman) lives there and sings loudly with a bunch of her friends.  One night, there's a violent struggle between one of the tenants and a few thugs looking for some drug mon...

3/4 Starring: Sarah Polley, Jake Weber, Ving Rhames, Michael Kelly, Kevin Zegers, Mekhi Phifer, Lindy Booth, Inna Korobkina, Michael Barry, Jayne Eastwood, Boyd Banks, R.D. Reid, Kim Poirier, Matt Frewer, Bruce Bohne The version being reviewed is unrated.  For the record, the theatrical cut is rated R for Pervasive Strong Horror Violence and Gore, Language and Sexuality I love a good zombie movie.  I mean, what is scarier than a bunch of undead ghouls chasing after you like an army of ants?  Kill one, and there are a dozen more behind them.  Even worse, if they bite you, you become one of them.  But for the most part, we can expect three things from them (" Warm Bodies " being the exception): lots of action, gore in copious quantities, and some good scares.  Zack Snyder's remake of George A. Romero's classic (unseen by me) provides all three.  And a bit more. It's a normal day for Ana (Polley) in Wisconsin.  She's late getting off work at ...

1/4 Starring: James LeGros, Maura Tierney, Christopher Walken, Tom Guiry, Kevin Corrigan, James Rebhorn Rated R for Language, Some Nudity, Drug Content and Brief Violence My dad is a huge fan of William Shakespeare.  Every time I tell him about stories or movies, he compliments Shakespeare and how he knew everything about storytelling.  He watched Kenneth Branagh's legendary adaptation of "Hamlet" with me, and we also watched the truly warped version of "Titus" starring Anthony Hopkins.  I considered waiting until he had some free time so we could watch "Scotland, PA," a humorous adaptation of Shakespeare's infamous tragedy "Macbeth," but I didn't.  In all honesty, I think my dad would thank me for sparing him the pain of watching what Billy Morrisette did to his hero's work. Yeah, you read the above right.  Writer/director Billy Morrisette has turned "Macbeth" into a comedy.  Let me rephrase: writer/director Bil...

3/4 Starring: Luke Grimes, Dan McCabe, Brian Dennehy, Mare Winningham, Misti Traya, James McDaniel, Mary Kay Place Rated PG-13 for Language and Sexual References Looks can be deceiving... Initially, "War Eagle, Arkansas" appears to be a standard order buddy comedy.  It's got the shy, handsome lead and his colorful and quirky best friend.  But as the film goes on, we realize that director Robert Milazzo has tapped into something much more original and powerful. Enoch Cass (Grimes) is a star baseball player in the tiny town of War Eagle, Arkansas.  His best friend is Sam "Wheels" Macon (McCabe), so named because his cerebral palsy has left him confined to a wheelchair.  Both of them fill a need for each other: Enoch has a severe stammer, especially when he gets nervous, so Wheels does a lot of the talking for him and gives him confidence.  Enoch is strong enough to perform the physical activities that neither Wheels nor his mother Jessie (Place) can do. ...

3/4 Starring: Martin Freeman, Ian McKellan, Richard Armitage, Evangeline Lilly, Lee Pace and the voice of Benedict Cumberbatch Rated PG-13 for Extended Sequences of Intense Fantasy Action Violence, and for Frightening Images When news came out that Peter Jackson was finally going to make "The Hobbit," the prequel to " The Lord of the Rings ," fans were extremely excited.  Then the news came that it would be split in two, which raised the eyebrows of many.  Shortly thereafter, it was revealed that it would be split into three films, which annoyed just about everyone.  Jackson and New Line Cinema claimed it was so they could insert J.R.R. Tolkien's ideas for the story that never made it into the book, the public still felt screwed.  They had to pay three times and wait three years to see the whole story.  That made sense for the trilogy, since it was based on three books, but "The Hobbit" is a much shorter story. " The Hobbit: An Unexpected ...

3/4 Starring: Michael Douglas, Robert DeNiro, Morgan Freeman, Kevin Kline, Mary Steenburgen Rated PG-13 for Sexual Content and Language I did not have high hopes for this movie.  I thought it would be like "The Bucket List" (also starring Morgan Freeman), where a safe, Z-list script would be cast with big stars so that undiscriminating audiences would be suckered into seeing it. Fortunately, I was wrong.  "Last Vegas," which is being marketed as "The Hangover" for the AARP crowd, is 90 minutes well spent.  It's not a masterpiece by any means; the funniest moments are in the trailer, and it's unlikely that many of the jokes will earn more than grins.  But, the four leads work hard to make their characters real, and that goes a long way. Paddy (DeNiro), Billy (Douglas), Archie (Freeman) and Sam (Kline) have been best friends all their lives.  Now in their golden years, they're coming together again for a weekend in Vegas to celebrate Bi...

2.5/4 Starring: Macaulay Culkin, Elijah Wood, Wendy Crewson, David Hugh Kelly, Jacqueline Brooks, David Morse Rated R for Acts of Violence and Terror involving a Disturbed Child I have to wonder who this movie was made for.  Sure, after " Fatal Attraction " became a massive hit, the "stranger within" genre became all the rage.  Far be it for me to criticize a movie for lacking a precisely defined audience, but did anyone really think that there was an audience for a movie like this starring pint-sized actors? "The Good Son" is one of those movies like " Hollow Man ;" it should have been a lot better than it actually was.  The premise, which is essentially " Single White Female " with prepubescent boys, has promise, but the execution is poor. Mark (Wood) is a sad little boy.  His mother just passed away.  Because his father Jack has been called away on business, he is staying with Jack's brother Wallace (Kelly) and his fami...

4/4 Starring: Patrick Wilson, Malin Akerman, Jackie Earle Haley, Billy Crudup, Matthew Goode, Carla Gugino, Jeffrey Dean Morgan Rated R for Strong Graphic Violence, Sexuality, Nudity and Language "Watchmen" is a super adult version of Pixar's "The Incredibles."  Admittedly, that's a gross understatement of what "Watchmen" accomplishes (not to bash Brad Bird's delightful feature), but the underlying concept is true.  Both take a look at the trials and tribulations of what being a superhero is really like and what it means.  "The Incredibles'" vision was light and fanciful.  "Watchmen's" is considerably darker and more pensive. The Watchmen are a group of superheroes that watch over New York City.  Replacing the Minutemen, who guarded the city decades ago, The Watchmen were the guardians of the city until being a superhero was outlawed a few years back.  All of them are doing their own things in the present (wh...

3/4 Starring: Ian McKellan, Brendan Fraser, Lynn Redgrave Rated R for Sexual Material and Language Like more than a few films, "Gods and Monsters" is closer to a misfire than a complete success.  It's emotionally cold, but well-acted and always interesting. The film takes place after the Korean War.  Filmmaker James Whale (McKellan) is retired and living out his life in his home.  Although he has a few friends come to visit, usually it is just him and Hana (Redgrave), his dutiful housekeeper.  One day he spies a handsome man working in his yard.  His name is Clayton Boone (Fraser).  James, who was one of the few openly gay men working in Hollywood, wishes to meet him and sketch his face.  They quickly form a strong bond that changes them both forever. The best thing about this movie is the characters.  James, Clay, and to a lesser extent, Hana, are well drawn, three dimensional individuals.  It's interesting to spend time with them....

2/4 Starring: Howie Long, William Forsythe, Suzy Amis, Scott Glenn Rated R for Violence and Language "Firestorm" starts of fairly well.  It assembles all the cliches of the action genre: the motley crew making small talk before going into the violent fray, the slo-mo, the hero who saves the cute little blonde girl (and the dog) when his superior thinks she can't be saved.  One of his crew even throws his helmet in the air when he emerges with the little girl in his arms. I was grinning to myself watching this.  Not so much affectionately, although I sorely miss action movies that take place in sunshine with no guys in capes.  No, I was smiling because it was so overplayed.  This sequence is so overblown that Dean Semler had to have intended it to be a parody.  Then again, considering how deadly serious he takes the rest of the movie, which is unbelievably silly, maybe not. Jesse Graves (Long) is the new chief of his unit of Smokejumpers (people wh...

2.5/4 Starring: Jamie-Lynn Sigler, Alex Solowitz, Andrea Bogart, Jennifer Tisdale, David Clayton Rogers, Patrick Renna Rated R for Strong Grisly Horror Violence and Gore, Sexuality, Nudity, Language and Some Drug Content Earlier this year, I went to my first "real" haunted house.  It was fun, and it had a much bigger budget than the Dark Ride in this movie, but it wasn't very scary.  It overdid the monsters and the effects (all of which were "cool" but not scary) to the point where it was overkill.  The movie "Dark Ride" is the same way.  It's a pretty cool concept for a slasher movie, but the level of violence and gore is so extreme that it becomes a turn off. Twenty years ago, two young girls went on the Dark Ride and didn't come out.  Both were gruesomely murdered by a hulking serial killer.  To make matters worse, more than a dozen bodies were found in the ride, and the Dark Ride was closed for good.  Now, it's about to be re-op...

3.5/4 Starring: Ethan Hawke, Laurence Fishburne, Maria Bello, Gabriel Byrne, Drea de Matteo, John Leguizamo, Brian Dennehy, Ja Rule Rated R for Strong Violence and Language Throughout, and for Some Drug Content "Assault on Precinct 13" was a thriller directed by John Carpenter.  Yes, that John Carpenter, although this was made two years before he made Michael Myers a name no one would forget ("Halloween" was his next film).  I haven't seen it, but it's considered to be something of a cult classic.  This remake, starring the always reliable Ethan Hawke and Laurence Fishburne, is a thriller of the first order. It's New Year's Eve.  Precinct 13 is going to be closed and torn down after many loyal years of service.  The building's last workers, ex-undercover officer turned desk worker Jake Roenick (Hawke), sexy secretary Iris Ferry (de Matteo) and old timer Jasper O'Shea (Dennehy) are packing up the last of boxes before they celebrate the...

3/4 Starring: Josh Duhamel, Rosario Dawson, Bruce Willis, Vincent D'Onofrio, Julian McMahon, Bonnie Sommerville, Eric Winter Rated R for Strong Violence, Language and Brief Sexuality As I've said before, I always encourage movies that take risks and try new things.  I'm a little more lenient on movies that do so, and "Fire with Fire" is one of them.  It has its problems, yes, but overall, I think it's a worthwhile experience. Womanizing firefighter Jeremy Coleman (Duhamel) is unlucky enough to witness the brutal murder of a gas station owner and his son.  The killer is Aryan gang leader David Hagan (D'Onofrio), and unfortunately for him, Jeremy escapes the same fate.  At the urging of narcotics officer Mike Cella (Willis) and district attorney Karen Westlake (Sommerville), Jeremy agrees to testify against Hagan and will be placed in Witness Protection until the trial.  But Hagan is crafty and dangerous, and he has the tools and the manpower to fi...