Cube
0.5/4
Starring: Maurice Dean Wint, David Hewlitt, Nicole de Boer, Nicky Guadagni, Andrew Miller, Julian Richings, Wayne Robson
Rated R for Some Strong Sci-Fi Violence/Gore and Language
For reasons that escape my understanding of human intelligence, "Cube" has become a cult hit. Even the director, Vincenzo Natali, got a shot at the mainstream (he directed the little seen "Splice") because of this movie. Either I missed something, or the world's viewing of film has become completely warped since 1997.
The bottom line is that this movie is crap. Apart from a few mildly suspenseful moments and some creative kills, this movie is completely without merit. The acting is uniformly terrible, the dialogue is banal, the characters are generally imbeciles who occasionally have astonishing and inexplicable leaps of intelligence, and there are scenes missing everywhere. It's also entirely pointless.
Seven people find themselves trapped inside a series of cubes with doors on each wall. Some of these rooms are benign and lead to more rooms, while others contain deadly traps. These seven people have to find out why they're in this bizarre maze and how to get out before they end up dead.
Almost none of these actors deserve to be in front of a camera ever again (David Hewlitt is okay, but nothing more). The acting is horrible; it wouldn't surprise me if it turned out that Natali only took one take for each scene. The worst of the lot is Nicole de Boer. She's annoying, but unfortunately she's one of the main characters. Ditto for Nicky Guagdini, who isn't much better, and her accent keeps slipping. Andrew Miller makes for an okay savant, but all he does is whimper, twiddle his fingers and act as a plot device. Maurice de Wint is horrible as the tough guy who suddenly goes psycho.
Based on this film, Vincenzo Natali has no talent whatsoever. The direction is constantly static, and the effects are cheesy. "Cube's" budget was a slim $365,000, which at first glance might explain the utter lack of quality in every area, but remember that the first "Paranormal Activity" was made for a fraction of that ($15,000 to be exact) and it was much more creative, better acted and infinitely scarier.
As bad as it is already, Natali and his screenwriters try to add a bit of pseudo-hip philosophy about how humanity is going down the drain because no one cares about each other anymore. Not only is this idea trite, but it's poorly developed and badly wedded into the story.
I suppose the film's "point," if you can call it that, is that good people can go bad very quickly when they're in extreme situations. Oh wow! I never realized that! No other movie has said the same thing before! Now I'm afraid to go out of my house.
Puh-leeze! This has been done so often that it has not only ceased to compel, it has become a cheap fallback. If you want to see how good people can go bad in a horror movie, watch "The Descent." It's infinitely superior on all levels: intelligence, ideas, scares and gore. Watching "Cube" will make you want to imitate Vincent Gallo; hurl a hex at Vincenzo Natali and anyone involved in this misbegotten project.
Please remember, the video service you rented this movie from is not responsible for the quality, or lack thereof, of the movie. They're just providing a service to those who do not heed my dire warning. Don't blame me if you get fined for putting the DVD through the woodchipper.
Starring: Maurice Dean Wint, David Hewlitt, Nicole de Boer, Nicky Guadagni, Andrew Miller, Julian Richings, Wayne Robson
Rated R for Some Strong Sci-Fi Violence/Gore and Language
For reasons that escape my understanding of human intelligence, "Cube" has become a cult hit. Even the director, Vincenzo Natali, got a shot at the mainstream (he directed the little seen "Splice") because of this movie. Either I missed something, or the world's viewing of film has become completely warped since 1997.
The bottom line is that this movie is crap. Apart from a few mildly suspenseful moments and some creative kills, this movie is completely without merit. The acting is uniformly terrible, the dialogue is banal, the characters are generally imbeciles who occasionally have astonishing and inexplicable leaps of intelligence, and there are scenes missing everywhere. It's also entirely pointless.
Seven people find themselves trapped inside a series of cubes with doors on each wall. Some of these rooms are benign and lead to more rooms, while others contain deadly traps. These seven people have to find out why they're in this bizarre maze and how to get out before they end up dead.
Almost none of these actors deserve to be in front of a camera ever again (David Hewlitt is okay, but nothing more). The acting is horrible; it wouldn't surprise me if it turned out that Natali only took one take for each scene. The worst of the lot is Nicole de Boer. She's annoying, but unfortunately she's one of the main characters. Ditto for Nicky Guagdini, who isn't much better, and her accent keeps slipping. Andrew Miller makes for an okay savant, but all he does is whimper, twiddle his fingers and act as a plot device. Maurice de Wint is horrible as the tough guy who suddenly goes psycho.
Based on this film, Vincenzo Natali has no talent whatsoever. The direction is constantly static, and the effects are cheesy. "Cube's" budget was a slim $365,000, which at first glance might explain the utter lack of quality in every area, but remember that the first "Paranormal Activity" was made for a fraction of that ($15,000 to be exact) and it was much more creative, better acted and infinitely scarier.
As bad as it is already, Natali and his screenwriters try to add a bit of pseudo-hip philosophy about how humanity is going down the drain because no one cares about each other anymore. Not only is this idea trite, but it's poorly developed and badly wedded into the story.
I suppose the film's "point," if you can call it that, is that good people can go bad very quickly when they're in extreme situations. Oh wow! I never realized that! No other movie has said the same thing before! Now I'm afraid to go out of my house.
Puh-leeze! This has been done so often that it has not only ceased to compel, it has become a cheap fallback. If you want to see how good people can go bad in a horror movie, watch "The Descent." It's infinitely superior on all levels: intelligence, ideas, scares and gore. Watching "Cube" will make you want to imitate Vincent Gallo; hurl a hex at Vincenzo Natali and anyone involved in this misbegotten project.
Please remember, the video service you rented this movie from is not responsible for the quality, or lack thereof, of the movie. They're just providing a service to those who do not heed my dire warning. Don't blame me if you get fined for putting the DVD through the woodchipper.
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