Takers

Starring: Matt Dillon, Idris Elba, Paul Walker, Hayden Christensen

3/4

Rated PG-13 for Intense Sequences of Violence and Action, A Sexual Situation/Partial Nudity, and Some Language

"Takers" is eye-candy for every gay man.  The cast is made up of some of the hottest actors in Hollywood who play the ultimate badasses, and they all look stylish as hell for the whole two hours.  It's an unambitious and featherlight thriller, but it's a great piece of eye candy.

Call the movie "Heat"-lite.  The plots are virtually the same: a group of criminals tries to steal lots of money while the cops try to take them down.  "Takers" doesn't have Pacino or DeNiro, and the running time is half that of Michael Mann's film, but maybe it's just because "Heat" is one of my favorite films of all time, I still liked it.  Or it could possibly be the fact that Paul Walker has a skinny dipping scene that's just fantastic.

Unfortunately, the film is so thin on character that the attempts to give the characters back-stories seem superfluous.  While this keeps the running time short (can't let the teenagers grow restless…), but it mutes the dramatic impact of the final hour.  Then again, with a cast like this, you weren't really expecting Oscar-caliber performances, were you?

Like I said, there's a enough eye candy to get anyone's heart a-flutter, and enough variety to make Willy Wonka happy.  Paul Walker is one of my favorite screen stars; not only is he drop dead gorgeous (and for someone pushing 40, he still looks incredible), and he's got more talent than people give him credit for.  Give him a good script and director, and he can do wonders (see "Running Scared" if you don't believe me).  Even without them, he's got enough charisma to carry him through just about anything.  Up and coming British actor Idris Elba gives the best performance in the film as the head criminal.  He's got screen presence and appeal (which is all that the script allows), and he has the talent to give his character some individuality.  Ex-bad boy Matt Dillon is a little flat, but admittedly, he's not given much to work with.  Rapper T.I. is adequate as the shady Ghost, who was a part of the group before he got caught and went to jail.  Hayden Christensen fails miserably, which is to be expected from someone with such limited range.

The one thing I have to complain about the casting is that the producers got girlfriend-beater Chris Brown to play a part.  In a world where bad news sells just as well as good news, the producers probably thought the name recognition could only help.  But this is low, even for Hollywood.

Director John Lussenhop does what is required of him: he keeps things moving at a brisk pace, directs the action scenes with a little flair, and casts his actors in the most flattering light possible.  The camera shakes often, but for the most part it's easy to tell what's going on.  The ending is suitably grim, but the obsession with getting a PG-13 rating forces him to make the violence bloodless, and as a result, some of the scenes look ridiculous.  It's a shame, because with some copious sex, nudity and gore, this film could have been a real guilty pleasure.

Note:  It has come to my attention that "Takers" was released in 2008, well after Chris Brown's domestic violence incident, and that his participation in the film was downplayed.  I guess Screen Gems isn't as guilty as I thought.